21 Of The Worst College Roommate Horror Stories Ever
She puked where?
1. The ones who thought they were cats.
"My first roommate and her boyfriend meowed as foreplay. Meowed. Like cats." —Jennifer Sprunger, Facebook
2. The puppeteer.
"My roommate in the dorms wore a puppet on her shoulder and if you asked her a question she would answer with the puppet. It was a puppet of a griffin, which is a mythological creature that's a combination of lion and eagle. It sucked. We also had all the same classes together and I woke up late more than once to that damn puppet in my face telling me the time." —Kate Edwards, Facebook
3. The nudist.
"Every night at 8 p.m. she would just take her clothes off. Not just down to her skivvies... I'm talking full birthday suit." —Samantha Ryan, Facebook
4. The emergency flooder.
"One of my roommates was notoriously late on projects. So why would I expect final projects to be any different? I was already in bed, trying to get a decent rest so I'd be prepared for my 8 a.m. art history final, when my roommate bursts in, saying we needed to move everything important because she had to flood the room. She was completely serious. She was going to flood the room so it would ruin her too-far-behind project (she knew she had no chance of finishing it in time), call the RA, and get a note saying she needed an extension on her project due to unforeseen circumstances. But, she said, we only should move important stuff. If everything of ours went undamaged it would look suspicious to the RA!
Thankfully my other roommate and I talked her out of it, but if we hadn't been there I truly believe she would have just gone ahead and done it!" —Jill Ryan Haer, Facebook
5. The voodoo doll.
"One day, I noticed my extra-crazy roommate had something hanging from her backpack. When I looked closer, it was a hand-sized voodoo doll — of myself." —Lydia Brewster, Facebook
6. The pathological liar.
"My sophomore-year roommate was a pathological liar. She told me she was allergic to peanut butter but then ate a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup in front of me. When I called her out on it, she said 'it wasn't concentrate' so it was fine... She also told me she was allergic to alcohol but then one night she told me she had gotten experimental enzyme shots from a friends so she could drink. Like, WTF?" —Megan Connelly, Facebook
7. The computer killer.
"I studied abroad and my roommate was a full-time student at the school, not an abroad student like me. Well, the school never told her she would be getting a roommate for a semester. She wasn't currently sharing a room, and was furious when I showed up. One night I went out with friends and came back to find my MacBook underwater and her only response to it was ¯\_(ツ)_/¯" —Kelly Burchard, Facebook
8. The cheater.
"Halfway through the year, one of my roommates discovered that the other was sleeping with her ex-boyfriend (during and after the relationship). The other roommate, having zero remorse for breaking the girl code, proceeded to spread nasty rumors about the other among their mutual friends, for some unknown reason. I would come home to them passive-aggressively yelling at each other or one of them crying/sobbing uncontrollably." —Vanessa Valencia, Facebook
9. The power vomiter.
"My freshman roommate's bed was lofted across the room from my bed that was lower. Right before I was supposed about to fall asleep, she sat up in bed, turned toward me, and projectile-vomited from her bed onto mine where I was lying down. She then puked half into the trash can and half on our carpeted floor for the next two days and never cleaned it up. This was following months of foul smells drifting from her closet of dirty clothes that she never washed and sleeping on a sheet-less bed for most of the year." —Tina Eileena, Facebook
10. The scary sleepwalker.
"My roommate last year sleepwalked every once in a while. In maybe the second or third last week of the school year, while sleepwalking, he came over to where my bed was, peed all over the floor, and then tried to climb into my bed when I was in it." —Jordan Wenik, Facebook
11. The bad baby daddy.
"My roommate got pregnant the week before college and she decided to stay through the fall semester. On top of her keeping her baby daddy in the room all of the time, she didn't like to go to the bathroom to throw up when she got morning sickness, so she would puke in a plastic bag and then make him clean it up. Living in a dorm with three people, one of whom is pregnant, is torture." —Kyra Lyn Crepin, Facebook
12. The twin trouble.
"My roommate was a girl I had been friends with in middle school. She had a friend who got kicked out of her living arrangement and asked me if she could stay for two weeks. I begrudgingly said yes. I ended up becoming friends with her and my roommate started to get jealous. One night the girl staying with us came in my room when my roommate was out with a solemn face. She said, 'Carmen, I have to ask you a question and I need you to be honest. Do you know who Tristan is?'
'No who, are you talking about?' I said. Her faced looked horrified. 'Holy shit, are you serious? She has been lying about having a twin brother! She told me she had a twin brother named Tristan. She has been saying that she is depressed because he moved to Hawaii to go to college and started doing drugs and won't talk to her anymore.'
I was floored. I confronted her about it and she moved out a week later." —Carmen Krebs, Facebook
13. The butter-knife butcher.
"I had a roommate once who for some reason hated me. One morning around 3 a.m. I found her standing over me with a butter knife. She had broken into my locked room and then was just staring at me. It freaked me out. I told her she was crazy. A few hours later, on my way to class, she stood at our front door yelling, 'I'm not crazy! I am not crazy!' Yeah sure, whatever you say." —Lissa Nicholas, Facebook
14. The tranquilizing terror.
"My first dorm room was an apartment with four girls, but one didn't sleep at night and would yell at us for quietly talking in the living room during the day. She threatened to put her tranquilizers in [our] brownies so it would be quiet." —Chelsea Hess, Facebook
15. The sleeping-bag slob.
"My roommate freshman year was so messy that she started sleeping in a sleeping bag on the floor because she couldn't get to her bed. To top it off, because her room was so messy, she had sex in my bed — which I didn't find out about until months later." —lexief4ffd473d6
16. The sobbing singers.
"My roommate and one of her friends were spending a lot of time together gearing up for a mission trip to Kyrgyzstan. Apparently that required them curling up in her bed together and sobbing loudly while listening to 'Total Eclipse of the Heart' at full blast from 1 a.m.–5a.m. on a nightly basis." —Jennifer Diringer, Facebook
17. The holier-than-thou.
"One of my college roommates used to throw holy water on me when she thought I was asleep." —Kelsey Allyn Trina, Facebook
18. The period pad hoarder.
"My roommate stored her trash and dirty dishes in the drawers of her nightstand and dresser. I thought that was the worst of it, until I opened a cabinet in our bathroom one night and found out she had been keeping her used period pads underneath a towel." —Ashley Simonsen, Facebook
19. The biological disaster.
"My freshman-year roommate was enrolled in a biology course with a lab component. One afternoon, I came back to the dorm and found her dissecting a pig's heart and lungs on her desk, like it was completely normal." —jenniferb4450b9ba9
20. The cancer creep.
"My roommate sophomore year faked a brain tumor for a year. She. Faked. A. Brain. Tumor. And people actually believed her." —Ellen Hubbs, Facebook
21. The prince of piss.
"I had a roommate come home drunk and pee on the stove. So, every time we cooked something it smelled like warm piss. Thanks, dick." —snjacobs78
Note: Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.