The Wyoming, Minnesota, police department likes to post some of its most outrageous stories on Twitter, and this is definitely one of them. Earlier this month, cops in the town of 8,000 responded to this call:
The immediate question was, HAD HE NEVER SEEN A COCKTAIL UMBRELLA BEFORE?
And apparently the answer was no.
Which leads us to wonder: Has this guy ever seen drugs? Does he know what drugs are?
And really:
But also... HOW YOU GONNA SNITCH ON YOUR WIFE LIKE THAT?