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    This Comedian Is Reimagining Sororities For Australians And I'm Wheezing Over The Accuracy

    "What's up, you beautiful dumb bitches? Welcome to the Delta Goodrem Mecca Maxima Omega 3 sorority house."

    For many Aussies, the concept of the American Greek system is cause for wonder, hilarity and — dare I say it — envy.

    Point Grey Pictures

    There's just something about the idea of living in a drunk madhouse with all your mates that appeals to the very foundations of Australian culture. 

    But with zero Greek life to be found on Aussie soil, we've been left to our imaginations when it comes to devising what an Australian sorority or fraternity might look like.

    Australian Vintage, Flickr: andrew_suggit

    Well, wonder no longer, my friends — Aussie comedian, Samantha Andrew, has dropped a series of hilarious TikTok videos exploring "If Australia had sororities":

    In the first video, Samantha talks through some of the ground rules for joining the sorority, opening with the traditional greeting of: "What’s up, you beautiful dumb bitches? Welcome to the Delta Goodrem Mecca Maxima Omega 3 sorority house."

    TikTok @samanthandrew, Getty Images / BuzzFeed

    She continues: "It's time for a few house rules — everyone must attend our mandatory Kath & Kim viewing at 7 P.M. on Wednesdays."

    ABC

    "You must bring a plate of the following: Footy franks, Tia Maria or barbecue Shapes."

    Food Facts, Kjetil Ree / Via en.wikipedia.org, Flickr @masaosada / Via Flickr: 120386744@N07

    "Not pizza shapes," she aims at a new recruit. "Michelle, can you please escort this random girl into the reject room, next to the Shannon Noll poster?"

    When it comes to your budding love life in the sorority house, there are only a few golden rules: "If you’re going to date someone, they cannot have one of the following names: Dazza, Gazza or Shazza."

    Nine Network

    "At DGMMO3, we only use lovely language: 'Fuck you' for 'love you', 'get fucked' for 'you’re really funny' and 'sis' for 'sister'."

    In a sentence: "Fuck you, sis, get fucked."

    Translation: "Love you, my treasured companion, you're hilarious."

    Samantha goes on to outline dress code too, saying: "On casual Thursdays, we only wear Supré statement tees, 'cause it’s fucking funny."

    Supré

    "The sport of our house is netball and our go-to statement is 'If you need!'"

    ABC / Twitter

    Samantha outlines some key scenarios where the phrase might need to arise, saying: "E.G. if a sis in the house is out of petrol and needs to go to Macca’s, then 'If you need!' — give her a lift."

    The DGMMO3 sisters debate whether it’s "munt" in the sink or scrambled eggs, as well as who is responsible for the Bondi Sands bum print on the toilet seat.

    TikTok @samanthandrew

    Pressing issues, that many a housemate has had to address in the past. 

    All I know is that these videos have me feeling a serious case of FOMO for my formative uni years — and what they might have looked like, if Australia adopted the Greek system.

    FOX

    What do you think — should Australian universities start offering their own take on sororities and fraternities? Let us know in the comments below!

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