24 Of The Best Tweets About The Ridiculousness Of Australia's Census

    "The 'How did you get to work today?' question on the Census form can go fuck itself."

    Last night was the official Census night in Australia. Which means that — unless you're one of the few highly-organised Aussies who filled it in ahead of time — you likely spent the evening craning over a phone or laptop, answering questions related to your health, income, religion, housing conditions and other social factors, all courtesy of a survey sent out by the Australian Bureau Of Statistics (ABS).

    This year, the Census has come under fire for a myriad of reasons, including being sexist, trans-exclusionary and erasing LGBTIQ+ people.

    The ABS erasing LGBTIQ+ people from the Census is a deliberate government strategy: what isn’t counted doesn’t exist

    Twitter: @joshuabadge

    To mark the end of this ~special time~ in Australians' lives, we've rounded up the very best Tweets mocking the Census:

    1.

    So many options on this #Census - fun so far.

    Twitter: @Dean_Nye

    2.

    You can be fined 2000 for lying on the census form but you can lie in federal parliament with no punishment whatsoever.

    Twitter: @OccupyMyGov

    3.

    *NSW government official checking the 2021 census results* Ah. It seems we no longer need any buses or trains. Or parking structures.

    Twitter: @MatthewBevan

    4.

    Some of these census questions are a bit weird?

    Twitter: @JonPiccini

    5.

    Couples around the country currently coming to terms with how much domestic work they actually do at home. #Census

    Twitter: @AvaniDias

    6.

    Nice to see the Census using the same methodology as my grandfather - randomly assigning gender to my toddlers because he hasn’t figured out they/them yet.

    Twitter: @NayukaGorrie

    7.

    The next Census is going to ask if you believe the earth is flat. #Census2021au

    Twitter: @scottdools

    8.

    The "how did you get to work today" question on the census form can go fuck itself

    Twitter: @DaveMilbo

    9.

    The Census: “Queer people? Never heard of them. Anyway, how much housework do you do?”

    Twitter: @rosealicepiper

    10.

    "The census is a breach of privacy" posts man on app that sells his every private detail to the highest bidder

    Twitter: @chaser

    11.

    There were some typos on the Census envelope so I fixed them. #census2021 #auspol

    Twitter: @deckeyesbevan

    12.

    Question 31 on the #Census2021au “Potato cakes or Potato Scallops?” took me by surprise.

    Twitter: @Picketer

    13.

    Hi! If you're a trans woman doing the #Census2021au tonight and don't know how to fill out the 'sex' question here's a simple guide.

    Twitter: @sayuhhm

    14.

    “Where The Fuck Was Scott Morrison For The Last Two Years?” And 7 Other New Questions Added To This Year’s Census https://t.co/bgpvss08xJ

    Twitter: @TheShovel

    15.

    not to get all hermione granger about it, but i did my census last week

    Twitter: @alexbrucesmith

    16.

    every distant-unknown-relative-at-christmas // the census

    Twitter: @BishopAlice

    17.

    How long do you have to send in your paper form census? And what would happen if I accidentally got my poo test and census mixed up?

    Twitter: @BecWrong

    18.

    That census is a real mood killer. Yes I’m alone, yes really alone, yes there is no one else, yep just me, no I have had no babies and yes I’m sure I’m really alone. Thanks for asking 👌

    Twitter: @GandWalter

    19.

    Cis allies becoming enraged by the structural transphobia of the Census is the only thing getting me through today.

    Twitter: @YvesRees

    20.

    Some of these #census questions were different from last time. Did anyone else get these?

    Twitter: @danfriendmusic

    21.

    Yeah, #census night is going well. Both my housemate (pictured) and I have had a meltdown with all these questions!

    Twitter: @E1MaWa

    22.

    Sneaky of the census to slip in "Are you racist but sorry bout it?" into the census, forevermore to be known as the Tex Walker Index.

    Twitter: @ScottTrindall

    23.

    She rolled out of bed….. #Census2021au

    Twitter: @SheahanClaire

    24.

    Census throwing some lockdown shade. #census2021

    Twitter: @JoseParkinson