Are you carrying tissues with you?Have you ever coughed and sneezed at the same time?Do you refer to common household allergy medicine as "bennys"?Have you "popped" an allergy pill?Can you name at least two kinds of generic allergy medicine?Do you hate trees?Do you hate tree-related festivals?Do you worry about the next season of allergies?Do you order tissues in bulk?Do you hate spring breezes?Do people wonder how you survived before allergy medicine?Do you take allergy meds to supplement other allergy meds?Is there something you wish was in your eye instead of pollen?Is that thing a sharp object?Do you consider your nose dripping no big deal?Do you announce in public that you're not sick, it's just allergies?Do you experiment with different kinds of allergy meds?Do you wonder if illegal drugs could help your allergies?Do you hate flowers?Do you hate mulch?Have you described heaven as a place without allergies?Do people go from "bless you" to "I hate you" by the end of one of your sneezing fits?Do you pray for when you will supposedly "grow out" of your allergies?Do people often think you've been crying?Have your allergies made you cry?When you wake up in the morning, do you feel a cloud of tiny knives stabbing you back to sleep?Have you sneezed while taking this quiz?Is there a place in the world you visualize yourself being instead of near anything alive?Can you locate and open an allergy pill capsule in the dark?Is the number of tissues you use counted in boxes?Is every surface of your face on fire?Do you have allergy medicine stored in more than one place at home?Are you carrying eye drops?Do you hate photosynthesis?Have you ever run out in a panic to purchase allergy medicine?Have you sneezed today?Have you used eye drops today?Have you developed a tolerance to antihistamines?Have you considered moving to escape your allergies?Have you considered moving to another planet to escape your allergies?Have you closed the window to avoid a pollen shower?Do you avoid public parks?Do you avoid outdoor sports?Do you believe that wearing glasses will shield your eyes from the burning glare?Do you steal napkins from restaurants in case your face explodes?Have your allergies made you reconsider your life choices?Have your allergies driven you to drink?Have you taught a child to hate flowers?Is eye-rubbing getting in the way of you living your life?Have you sneezed (again) while taking this quiz?
How Bad Are Your Seasonal Allergies?
Your allergies may rule your life, but you have big plans in store after this medicine kicks in! As you soldier on in the daily battle against things that are alive, know that you are not alone, and that your sneezes could be weaponized in the future, making you both useful AND deadly. Go forth, brave allergy-haver. And bring tissues.
Congratulations, occasional sneezer! You can be near things that are alive without having to question your existence in the first place. The time you have spent sneezing is minimal next to all the great things you have done. The occasional, sinister sneeze tickles your nose at the worst times, but never let that stand in the way of your superpowers. You will do great things!
Congratulations, you are a human antihistamine and you can walk through a cloud of allergens with pride and dignity. You have spent minimal time on this planet sneezing and blowing your nose, so don't be afraid to do big things. The world is yours to smell!