1. Have a kick-ass haircut.
2. For instance a mullet.
3. Or a jheri curl.
4. Or a flat-top.
5. Or a buzz cut.
6. Or an afro.
7. Just not whatever Larry Bird has going on here.
8. Awesome facial hair is a plus.
9. Can't grow facial hair? Just smirk.
10. Nope. Too angry, Patrick.
11. Mickey, didn't you hear what I said to Patrick? Chill out.
12. Yeah, just like that.
13. Having a cool-guy collar helps too.
14. Or fancy glasses.
15. Rock a skinny tie.
16. Or a hoodie.
17. Or a great tux.
18. Or a frilly shirt.
19. But never wear a shirt that looks like Bill Cosby designed it.
20. If you can somehow combine a jheri curl, a mustache, a frilly shirt, and a great tux, you're doing something right.
21. Pose with a bitchin' computer.
22. Don't look too high.
23. Maybe don't look high at all.
24. Try not to look like a dork.
25. Eat some McDonald's cookies in your photo.
26. Have a twin brother, so you can mess with people.
27. Look badass playing a sport you'll be famous for.
28. Look goofy playing a sport you're not famous for.
29. Have a great yearbook quote.
30. For that matter have a really dumb yearbook quote. Either extreme is fine.
31. Walk around your high school gym like its a club.
32. Have a cute date.
33. Hold public office.
34. Make sure to button your shirt correctly.
35. And that your necklace doesn't look stupid.
36. Graduating always makes for a good picture.
37. Be the most adorable American athlete in the history of the Olympics.
38. Or be the greatest athlete of all time.
39. Or just be Jeremy Lin.
