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How Much Do You Hate People?

People are the worst.

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    When someone walks really slowly.
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    When someone walks really slowly while blocking your path.
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    When people walk really slowly up stairs in front of you.
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    When people walk really slowly down stairs in front of you.
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    When people stand on the escalator.
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    When people bump into you.
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    When someone delays the elevator by running on at the last second.
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    When that person takes the elevator to the second floor.
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    When people yell for no reason.
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    When someone has an annoying laugh.
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    When someone is laughing and laughing at something that can't possibly be that funny.
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    When someone cuts in line.
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    When people suck at waiting in line.
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    Group projects.
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    When someone repeatedly taps a pen.
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    When people are walking in front of you and then stop suddenly.
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    When someone drives slowly in the fast lane.
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    When someone makes loud chewing or drinking sounds.
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    When someone takes forever at the ATM doing god knows what.
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    When someone takes forever using the self-checkout at the grocery store.
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    When someone blocks the aisle at the grocery store.
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    When someone gets in line ahead of you a split second before you were there.
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    When someone talks really loud on a plane or a train.
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    When the stranger sitting next to you wants to chat.
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    When people get on the train before letting others off.
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    When someone leans their whole body on a pole on a train.
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    When people take up a seat with their bag.
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    When people save seats in a movie theater.
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    When there's a crowd anywhere.
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    When someone says "excuse me" because they're too lazy to take a different path around.
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    When someone says "excuse me" for any reason.
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    When all the seats somewhere are taken.
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    When the only seat left is next to a weirdo.
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    When someone parks poorly.
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    When someone takes the parking spot you were clearly about to take.
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    When people leave a mess.
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    When there's a line for the bathroom.
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    When someone does anything weird in a public restroom.
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    When someone takes forever in a single-person bathroom.
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    When someone plays music without headphones.
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    When people push through the crowd at concerts.
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    When someone spills a drink on you.
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    When someone randomly bursts into song in a non-Broadway setting.
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    When someone randomly bursts into song in a Broadway setting.
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    When your neighbors are really loud.
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    When your neighbors play bad music.
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    When you neighbors play good music.
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    When your neighbors say hi.
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    When someone looks over your shoulder at what you're reading.
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    When someone asks you for a favor.
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    When someone says, "Are there any more questions?" And then someone asks a question.
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    When someone gets all up in your personal space.
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    When someone gives you a look.
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    When someone asks you to explain your job.
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    When someone asks, "Read any good books lately?"
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    When someone asks, "What kind of music do you like?"
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    When someone asks, "How are you?"
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    When someone says, "Good morning!"
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    When someone says, "Happy Friday!"
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    When anyone speaks.
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    Laughter.
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    Children.
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    The laughter of children.
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    When people are around.
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    People.

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