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Flickr: joeshlabotnik
I love brunch.I live for brunch.I use brunch as a verb.I brunch like a champion.I brunch almost every weekend.I brunch EVERY weekend.I have a regular brunch spot.I have a regular brunch spot where they know me.I have a regular brunch spot where they fear me.Brunch is "my thing."Brunch is "my jam."Brunch is my lifestyle.I have used the phrase "boozy brunch."I have used the phrase "boozy brunch" un-ironically.I don't believe in brunch without alcohol.I prefer my brunch to be all-you-can-drink.I enjoy getting drunk during the day.I love breakfast food better than all other food.I love mimosas.I love bloody marys.I love screw drivers.I love bellinis.Orange juice is sad if there's no booze in it.I've had beer with brunch.There's nothing quite like drinking alcohol and eating eggs at the same time.I have chugged a mimosa.I have had more than 6 mimosas in a row.I usually lose track of how many drinks I have at brunch.I have passed out after brunch.I have passed out during brunch.I have been on the floor during a brunch.I have been kicked out of brunch.Brunch without alcohol is like a day without sunlight.Like an angel without wings.Like the sky without stars.Like the world without love.If they made alcoholic French toast, I would order it.If they made alcoholic eggs Benedict, I would order it.If brunch included a complimentary side of all-you-can drink grain alcohol, I would drink it.I have brunched two days in a row.I have brunched three days in a row.I have brunched four or more days in a row.I have brunched twice in one day.I'm brunching right now.I currently have brunch plans.I keep a brunch calendar.I have a brunch club.I am president of the brunch club.I have a brunch-related nickname, like The Waffle Master.My nickname actually is The Waffle Master.I brunch like it's my job.Brunch should be my job.Brunch is my personal identity.I dream about brunch.I have been sexually aroused by brunch.I'm proud of what I do at brunch.I destroy brunch.I go to town on some brunch.Brunch brunch brunch brunch.I feel like I win at brunch, somehow, even though it's not technically a competition.
