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The Essential Daily Routine For The Unemployed Among Us

Essential, as in "you can't escape it."

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1. Wake up and get out of bed. You are well on your way to a meaningful day!


Sounds so simple, doesn't it?

2. Get down on your go-go juice.


No journey to employment can really start without something in your cup. Take that however you need to.

3. And food, 'cause...pangs of hunger could totally kill your job-scouting vibe.

4. Now you can troll Craigslist with ever-waning pickiness.

5. Have your moment of self-doubt.

6. Then let the Marney in you reason your way past it.

7. Get back to optimistically chewing over visions of yourself in very disparate jobs in front of the glow of your computer.


Account manager? I could do that. Copywriter? I could do that. Personal assistant? I could do that. Event coordinator? I could do that. Financial reporter? I could do that.

8. Go out for more coffee.


9. Update your résumé to be perfect and beautiful and more perfect and more beautiful until it's the most perfect and most beautiful.


That phrasing right there! That's what's been holding me back.

10. Skype your bestie for emotional support and encouragement.

11. Assure mom that everything is OK.

Even though inside you're like:

12. Get a little distracted for a very long time.

13. To refocus, you go to a coffee shop...which also happens to be a bar.

14. Finally stumble onto what looks like the PERFECT gig.

15. Or not.

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