10 Ways To Make Riding In Crowded Trains More Fun

It's rush hour, and you're trapped between pancake arms and Sir Coughsalot. What WILL you do?

1. Subtly graze up on a hottie

Let's face it, this may be your only chance/excuse. Hot in here or just me? Me? Okay.

2. Make eyes with the faraway hottie

3. Vibe to your neighbor's ridiculously loud earphones

Hey turn it up I LOVE THIS SONG.

4. Art: Clumsily fall down at every stop

"But I'm a performance artist! I really am!" You may say it with conviction, but things will definitely get hostile by the fourth stop.

5. Fart. But, like, be sneaky about it.*

*Depending on your brand, this might not make things all that more fun. #personalbrandsmatter

6. Have that Dopp kit in tote!

Clipping the nails, breaking out the comb — it's time for a little me time. Lucky for you guys!

7. Bring a warm sack of food aboard and become the envy of all

Yeah, I thought a little before I came down here and — hah — well I guess that's pretty obvious to everyone by now.

8. Craft your BREAKTHROUGH TWEET

Then save that precious RT-worthy jewel to drafts, hunnie.

9. While you're at it, catch up on your txt game

10. Or you could whip out a book, I suppose...