Here Are Some Reusable Straws That Don't Totally Suck

You're the one who sucks! (Get it??)

Unless you have been living under a rock for the past few months, you may have noticed that one-time-use plastic straws are on the OUTS!

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Single-use plastic, like drinking straws, shopping bags, and other thin plastics can't be recycled are getting a lot of scrutiny lately for how they affect the environment, and especially wildlife. A dead baby seal found with thin plastics in its stomach was one of the final straws, so to speak, that catalyzed the movement.

Entire cities are banning them. Even Starbucks and McDonald's are going to stop using them!

But if you're like me, you also know that things just taste better through a straw!

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The Duchess knows! They just do! Iced coffee! Tropical cocktails! Fountain soda! Big Gulps! Milkshakes!!!!!!!

And if you're a fellow clumsy drinker, you also know that the cup-to-mouth method is not foolproof.

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Might as well just put the coffee directly on the shirt, amirite?

Related: this stain remover rules.

There are a lot of straw alternatives that are just BAD, like the paper ones that basically melt right in your mouth. And not in a good M&Ms way.

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And don't get me started on those metal straws. Banging metal on your teeth ten times a minute? No, thank you!

Bamboo straws sound good in theory, but just thinking about tongue splinters is torture enough.

But alas, I have finally found an acceptable alternative that brings back the joy of sucking liquid through a tiny stick, without the same social and environmental harm!

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They're ~$10, non-toxic, colorful, and come in their own zip-able container, which is always a plus.

They're thick enough to work with smoothies and frozen drinks, but not so thick that you get a ton of liquid when you use them with normal viscosity beverages. They come with a plastic ring to prevent slipping from portable cups (like our favorite RTIC version), but they work just fine in all sorts of open-topped glasses, too. You could even use them to identify drinks at a party!

My biggest worry with any reusable straws is getting them actually clean. This pack includes a convenient brush that gets right in there to scrub the slime (or smoothie) out.

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They're also dishwasher safe! But you'll want to use the brush before dishwashing them in the silverware rack to make sure the solids get scrubbed.

I know what you're thinking: what if you're a chewer? Won't these just get all mangled? But no!

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These things are thick. They're marketed as "unbreakable," and while I haven't tried anything drastic, you can definitely chomp down without leaving a mark.

Plenty of other people have been converted well. Check out some promising Amazon reviews below:

"Love these straws! I use them for my smoothies and even cut a couple to use in my water bottles. They have the stopping rings molded into them if you use them in sippy cups. I just throw them in the dishwasher and reuse! My daughter is a biter and they don't get ruined as quickly as other straws. Saves money on buying disposable straws and saves the environment. And as a bonus, makes drinks look festive!" - krespach

"These are AWESOME!!! They are wearing like IRON! We use them every day and they go in the dishwasher daily...and after two months they still look new!! Don't hesitate!" - Happy Mom

"LOVE LOVE LOVE these straws! The colors are great and they fit perfectly in my Yeti, Rtic AND Ozark Trail 20 and 30 ounce tumblers. We get to coordinate the colors with our decals. :)" - missylisac

"Disposable straws suck (pun intended)! These are a great replacement. Even though the world is probably doomed anyway I feel like I can sort of pat my self on the back for using these, at least until we burn up into a little fiery Earth ball because of climate change. :D" - missgubba ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

So that's it. Case closed. If I can convert to hard plastic sippers, so can you. Get thee some Cuptures ASAP.

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Let this record-holder be the last.

The reviews in this post have been edited for length and clarity.

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