1.
WHO IS MY EX-GIRLFRIEND
2.
Guy: I think we should see other people. Me: *claps along to mariachi band standing next to table* haha what
3.
WTF MY EX CAN FLY?
4.
Dating is collecting information about someone until you realize you don't like them
5.
when ur drunk and ur ex texts you "hey"
6.
Do u hear that music? "ugh its my crazy ex again" How can you tell? [i come whipping around the corner in an ice cream truck] FUCK YOU GREG
7.
the stages of a breakup: 1. denial 2. anger 3. bargaining 4. taking pictures of everything you do to make sure people know you're having fun
8.
Him: I need space. Me:
9.
COP: u were swerving a lot so i have to conduct a sobriety test ME: ok COP: lets get taco bell ME: no COP: text ur ex ME: no COP: ok ur good
10.
Lawyer: did your boyfriend commit the crime? Girlfriend: honey he can't even commit to this relationship Entire jury: OH SNAP
11.
I tried to swipe a crumb off my phone and accidentally liked all 240 pictures of my ex girlfriend’s trip to Maui with Roger
12.
EX: WHAT HAPPENED TO US? WHAT HAPPENED TO THE MAGIC IN OUR RELATIONSHIP? ME:
13.
14.
Repeatedly unfollowing and refollowing my ex in Morse code that spells out "I still have your Gilmore Girls DVDs"
15.
Your ex is posting passive-aggressive spiritual memes again
16.
IF U BUMP INTO UR EX WITH HIS NEW GIRL ACT FAKE EXCITED TO MEET HER AND SINCERELY SAY "OMG I RLY LIKE UR PAJAMAS" NO MATTER WHAT SHE WEARING
17.
When your ex says they'll find someone better than you
18.
Me trying to get over a breakup
19.
When you & bae break up
20.
HOW TO RESPECTFULLY BREAK UP WITH SOMEONE: -do it in person -be honest -do less karate -why are u doing so much karate during this -stop it
21.
Sorry I broke up with you by saying "have a great summer"
22.
Very normal stages of anger: 1) kinda upset 2) crying 3) imagining yourself singing a revengeful song to them at a talent show
23.
when your ex hits you up