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    Jul 2, 2014

    21 Things That Would Make Adulthood Actually Tolerable

    Kids take so much for granted. So much.

    1. Bubbles.

    Potential adult usage: When you have that heartbreaking moment when you realize your SO is winning the argument, just blow bubbles on them.

    2. Getting toys and stickers at the dentist's office.

    Potential adult usage: I just survived a root canal. Where are my little plastic army men???

    3. Ball pits.

    Potential adult usage: How about a ~massage~ version??

    4. Naps.

    Potential adult usage: Duh. It's a NAP.

    5. Swingsets.

    Potential adult usage: Sometimes, after a long, loooong day, you just need to SWING IT OUT.

    6. Pixy Sticks.

    Potential adult usage: A more fun way to take heartburn medicine? Powdered Tums!

    7. Pizza parties.

    Potential adult usage: Remember how your class got a pizza party if you won some competition? What about if our WHOLE APARTMENT pays the wifi bill on time??

    8. Coloring at restaurants.


    Potential adult usage: Making your boring work dinner a little more ~festive.~

    9. Sippy cups.

    Potential adult usage: There comes a time in every person's life where white wine MUST be smuggled into the park.

    10. Legos.

    Potential adult usage: Building awesome stuff. Or for stealthily hiding on the floor for your arch-nemesis to step on.

    11. Bibs.


    Potential adult usage: Two words: Chipotle. Burrito.

    12. Falling asleep in the back of the car as your parents drove you home from someone's birthday party.

    Potential adult usage: Your DD drives your drunk self home from a party while you take a nice sobering snooze.

    13. Shoes that light up when you walk on them.

    Potential adult usage: "Treadmill in the dark" aerobics classes!

    14. Chuck E. Cheese.

    Potential adult usage: Keep the pizza. Trade the soda for a full bar. Tickets get you annoyingly expensive things like car insurance and Gillette Venus blades. (This is basically Dave & Buster's. More of these, please!)

    15. Glitter.

    Potential adult usage: Send it with your resumé for a little "something extra." (Maybe only if you're applying to a party supply company.)

    16. Blankets you always carry with you.

    Potential adult usage: Effective way to combat overzealously air-conditioned offices.

    17. Enforced bed times.

    Potential adult usage: Asleep by 10 every night? Don't mind if I do!

    18. Baths.

    Potential adult usage: BATHS ARE AMAZING.

    19. Goldfish crackers.

    Potential adult usage: A snack easily carried around in a ziplock bag that tastes better than kale chips.

    20. Sandboxes.

    Potential adult usage: Come on, you can totally get work done on your laptop while ALSO building a sweet-as-hell castle.

    21. Sidewalk chalk.


    Potential adult usage: Passive-aggressively letting your neighbors know you can HEAR THEM going to poundtown.

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