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    People Are Laughing Because Melbourne's Beaches Are Full Of Poo


    The Environment Protection Authority of Victoria warned people yesterday to avoid swimming in several beaches around Melbourne due to an influx of poo.

    Going swimming in the bay? Sign up for beach water quality SMS at

    That's right, due to recent storms, 21 beaches were rated as having POOr water quality. EPA spokesperson Dr Anthony Boxshall told ABC News 24 the beaches were full of an array of faeces: "It's bird poo, it's horse poo, it's cow poo and it's people poo. It is everything that washes in from the streets, and everything that comes out through the storm water system."

    Needless to say, people seized the opportunity to dump on Melbourne.

    Melbourne: our coffee is nicest Sydney: your beaches are covered in poo Melbourne: ...

    I implore all my Melbourne friends today to go for a swim in the poo water. Go on, Life* Be In It!!! * poo water

    Poo beaches?? Really Melbourne, you must try harder...

    It's official. Melbourne is a shit hole.

    this isn't what i meant when I said Melbourne has shit beaches

    There's actually been poo on Melbourne's beaches for years but no one ever noticed

    Oh excellent, Australia's made international headlines again oh wait—

    Talk about dumping on the new year. BBC News - Melbourne warned of beach poo hazard after storms

    Was feeling pretty great to start 2017 with a 3am swim in Port Melb on New Years'. Now I'm reading that I started the year swimming in shit.

    ..I have been saying for years, Melbourne is full of shit!

    On the plus side, the shit seems to be floating away.

    Good news, everyone! There's only a fair chance of shit in Port Phillip Bay this morning. @ABCNews24 #Melbourne

    BuzzFeed has reached out to the EPA for an update on the poo beach situation.

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