24 Things All Australians Say When They're In London
But really, how hard is it to make a decent coffee?
"Didn't I just pass a Pret A Manger 200 metres ago? Why is there another one here?"
"Which way to Diagon Alley?"
"Every building here is so old, this city must be haunted as fuck."
"Considering that we're pretty much Britain and we have the same monarch can we please have our own immigration line at Heathrow? Because I do not have two hours to spare."
"Wow, the tube is so efficient."
"But also it's like five degrees outside – why is it a fucking oven down here?"
"I am so poor right now, why is our dollar so bad?"
"SIXTEEN POUNDS FOR AN UMBRELLA? Lol bye."
"Why is Oxford Circus called circus when there is clearly no circus here?"
"And I see no garden in Covent Garden either."
"Also you guys live like an hour away from Paris. Why aren't you going there every weekend?"
"Um, it's 4pm. Why is it dark?"
"Every time someone talks to me I feel like I'm in Downton Abbey, this is fab."
"This coffee is terrible but it cost me $11, so I have to drink it all."
"My calves are so great thanks to the billions of stairs in every tube station."
"Every second person here is literally an Aussie."
"Why is Tower Bridge not actually called The Spice Girls Bridge?"
"My shoes are straight-up going to fall apart after walking on so many cobblestones."
"Do people actually like mushy peas?"
"Who do I have to kill to get a slice of Vegemite toast?"
"I get the whole royal thing but honestly what's up with these fluffy-hatted guards and why do they need to change so pompously?"
"Jolly good, cheerio, pip pip."
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