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21 Stages Of Leaving An Assignment To The Last Minute

"I NEED ALL THE COFFEE AND ALL THE CANDY STAT."

1. You look at your subject outline and realise that you have a huge assignment due in a week.

2. You try to motivate yourself.

3. You make a deal: “OK, if I do 300 words every day then it’ll be so easy."

4. You're feeling pretty proud of yourself for how well you're handling this.

5. Suddenly, somehow, it's three days before your due date and all you've done is open a reading on your computer, then minimised it.

6. You start to mildly panic but still try to tell yourself that three days is a long time.

7. Magically it gets to the night before your assignment is due and you have 3,000 words to write by 9am.

8. You make yourself a coffee and grab all the sugary snacks you can find and open your computer.

9. After a promising start where you write the title and your name in a blank document, you then have a mini breakdown.

10. "HOW DID I GET MYSELF INTO THIS POSITION?!?!"

11. After five minutes of sobbing and stuffing red frogs into your mouth, you pull your shit together and start typing.

12. You type nonstop for two hours and finish about a quarter of it, so you take a break to congratulate yourself.

13. Your 10-minute coffee break turned into a 45-minute TV break. Shit.

14. When you drag yourself back to your computer to reread your work, you realise it makes little sense and is basically all repeating itself.

15. By this point it’s nearing midnight and you seriously consider just going to bed and dealing with it all later.

16. After spending 10 minutes scrolling aimlessly through your Facebook feed, you guzzle a whole cup of coffee and commit to finishing this assignment.

17. By 4am you’ve reached your word count (or close enough anyway) and do a really quick skim read.

18. If you're being honest, it doesn't make much sense, but whatever. As long as you submit something, you don't even care.

19. Once you've finished referencing and submitting, it's starting to get light outside.

20. You fall into bed, with absolutely no energy left.

21. As you go to sleep, you tell yourself that next time you’ll actually start your assignment earlier. Probably.