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1. You had a three-way with two pieces of Italian squash.
2. You only drink kale-infused liquids.
3. You frequently wake up covered in egg whites with no memory of the previous evening.
4. You can't remember the last time you had lunch.
5. You refuse to eat at restaurants that don't serve food 'family style.'
6. You sold your TV for a bottle of chipotle aioli.
7. You wake up screaming: "I paid LAST time!"
8. Strangers comment on the asparagus powder lines under your nose.
9. You frequently joke that you have tomato juice instead of blood.
10. You find yourself asking strangers where you can "score some wasabi peas."
11. You hardly speak to your closest protiens anymore.
12. You haven't been to a BA meeting in months.
13. You tried to stab Beth with a corn cob.
14. You sold your body for a bottle of champagne.
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