Buzz·Posted on 10 Dec 201522 Tweets That Prove 69 Is The Funniest Number"If you're ever worried there's an intruder in your house, shout 69 down the stairs. If no one laughs, there's no one there."by Jamie JonesBuzzFeed StaffLinkFacebookPinterestTwitterMail 1. dan mentos @DanMentos judge: I hereby sentence you to 68 years in prison my lawyer: your honor my client respectfully requests a year be added to his sentence 05:17 PM - 30 Nov 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 2. Fred Delicious @Fred_Delicious if you're ever worried there's an intruder in your house, shout 69 down the stairs. if no one laughs, there's no one there 04:28 PM - 05 Mar 2013 Reply Retweet Favorite 3. A Random Him @arandomhim *walks into the hottest restaurant w/out a reservation* We're fully booked "Ahem, I'm Yelp reviewer TURDBONER69" Sorry sir right this way 03:57 PM - 03 Sep 2013 Reply Retweet Favorite 4. broad city LARPer @rachelmillman I got in trouble at work for writing "nice" next to every 69 and had to cross them out 05:59 PM - 09 Dec 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 5. Bucky Isotope @BuckyIsotope Just did my taxes. Put $420.69 on every line and 5 IRS agents just showed up at my door with a keg, 3 strippers and giant foam fingers. 02:44 AM - 22 Mar 2013 Reply Retweet Favorite 6. The Phantom Grimace @Baxterbix I get it Bryan Adams. It was the summer of 69, but what year? 04:47 PM - 04 Apr 2013 Reply Retweet Favorite 7. birthday twat @jazmasta If I had a dollar for every time I unnecessarily sexualized a sentence I'd have 69 dollars. 11:49 AM - 20 Nov 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 8. Fred Delicious @Fred_Delicious Girl are you the moon landing cuz you were fakin' it in '69 03:26 PM - 07 Nov 2013 Reply Retweet Favorite 9. GoaT FacE ThrillA @EndhooS My dad told me that when he was at school he deliberately got himself held back a year TWICE just so he could graduate in the class of '69 06:59 AM - 04 Sep 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 10. egg donk @egg_dog Never ask a 69 year old to act their age 10:35 AM - 11 Oct 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 11. Hermione Manger @OhNoSheTwitnt Literally the only thing amusing about Donald Trump at this point is the fact that he's 69. 03:56 PM - 23 Nov 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 12. ghost mom @radtoria HIM: Talk dirty to me. ME: Um ok. Uh wanna ride the ovulator to the 69th floor? You like making this baloney sandwich? *velociraptor noise* 08:53 PM - 20 Mar 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 13. Rob Cee, Esq. @TheRobCee [goes inside of gas station, pre-pays for 69 cents of fuel, puts on shades, does crotch-chops all the way back to the pump] 10:54 PM - 23 Sep 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 14. pat tobin @tastefactory *sees that a basketball team has 69 points* Haha sixty- *the team quickly gets another point* Uh nothing, I wasn't saying anything. 03:15 AM - 05 Apr 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 15. Jeff Wysaski @pleatedjeans If you write 420-696-6969 on your emergency contact form a frat will show up at the hospital w/ beer pong blasting Kid Rock 06:04 PM - 20 Oct 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 16. Poorly Drawn Turtle @NoTheOtherJohn If you push "I 69" on any vending machine it will give you your dollar back and unlimited Kit-Kats. 07:29 PM - 13 May 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 17. Fred Delicious @Fred_Delicious most people think 4th base is the last base but if u rub doritos on a girls boobs that's 5th base. 14th base is 69'ing in a volcano 09:22 PM - 11 Jun 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 18. dan mentos @DanMentos [god inventing numbers] "66" very good your holiness "67" excellent work your grace "68" you've done it again my lord "69" lmao 11:42 PM - 17 Sep 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 19. Big Money Rowlf @iRowlf I just realized that giraffes can't 69 and now I can't sleep. 03:31 AM - 30 Jun 2013 Reply Retweet Favorite 20. Bucky Isotope @BuckyIsotope blink 182 - Maroon 5 + 69 + 420 = 666 05:38 PM - 29 Jul 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 21. Cool Eric @OBiiieeee Son, I'm thinking of a num- "69" *dad starts flailing his arms* SEE, HONEY, HE'S A GOD DAMN WIZARD 03:47 PM - 09 Jun 2013 Reply Retweet Favorite 22. Kelgore Schureman @KelgoreTrout 69 06:28 AM - 17 Nov 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite