20 Ways You Know You Ride Public Transportation Too Much

If these pertain to you, you are a train hopping, bus transferring bad ass…. Remember that next time you sit in pee on the train.

1. You no longer have qualms about eating on a train or bus.

I’ve got places to be, food to eat, and little time to do it.

2. You think twice about giving up your seat to an old person.

Fiiiiine, but screw the pregnant ladies, they brought this upon themselves.

3. Your most used app is either a bus or train tracker….

…well, second only to the Shazam and Rotten Tomatoes Apps.

4. Most of your conversations end in an argument about which public transportation route would be the quickest.

“Well you could just take the Red Line to the Brown Line or you can take the Purple line to the Blue Line and take a bus.”

5. Your day is shot when you see that the escalator at your train stop is broken.

Nothing good can come out of a day that starts with stairs.

6. You have a strong opinion on the controversial ‘bus vs. train’ issue.

Trains are better….if you want to get thrown up on.

7. The highlight of your month* is when you hear your train is running ‘express’ straight to your stop.

*year

8. ….but when the train runs ‘express’ to the stop after yours….

“KEEP IT TOGETHER LIZZIE. ONE DAY YOU WILL BE ON SNL AND YOU’LL NEVER HAVE TO RIDE PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION AGAIN.”

9. You have accepted the fact that when you go out of town, your train ride to the airport takes longer than your cross country flight.

Too bad they don’t have frequent rider miles for trains.

10. You have ended multiple friendships because they involved more than 1 train transfer….

…or the combination of 1 train and 1 bus transfer.

11. You haven’t run a mile in 3 years, but you turn all Flash Gordon when you hear an inbound train in approaching.

…because you could walk to your destination before the next train will get there.

12. You get more action on the rush hour train than your freshman year of college….

…solicited or not.

13. Riding in a car is an exciting, rare experience…

like that of seeing a smile from a bus driver.

14. You have that one friend that you hate, but must hang onto…because they have a car.

Your relationship really heats up a week before moving day.

15. There is nothing weird to you about this picture.

….maybe besides the fact that the guy in the front didn’t take the window seat.

16. When someone hits on you on the train, your reaction is:

You gain some sort of confidence on that train.

17. But if you make eye contact with someone sexy on the train, you start thinking about how many kids you will be having together.

You looking my way cowboy?

18. You may not know any of the Supreme Court Justices, but you can name every stop on your line from start to finish.

Oh, and you can recite Dumb and Dumber, from start to finish. “The town is back THAT way.”

19. But no matter how long you have ridden public transpo (as we say in the bizz), your reaction on the outside when it is 2am and you and only 1 other person are on a train car:

Cool cucumber.

20. But on the inside, you will always be:

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