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How Bougie Are You?

You've had heated debates over how to spell "sadiddy." Wait, we mean "seditty." Er... "saditty."

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  1. Check all that apply...

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    You fervently hate Tyler Perry.
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    And Beyoncé stans.
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    You consider yourself a part of the "Talented Tenth."
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    You were invited to join Jack and Jill.
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    Your parents went to college.
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    So did your grandparents.
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    You attended an HBCU.
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    You've had an argument over which HBCU has the best band.
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    You pledged a fraternity or sorority.
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    So did your parents.
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    And your grandparents.
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    You wear an item of Greek paraphernalia every time you go out.
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    Every photo of you includes the hand symbols that represent your Greek letter organization.
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    You make it a point to see Alvin Ailey every December.
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    You deride your friends for ordering steak well-done.
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    You brag about liking yours the proper way: rare or medium.
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    You can't stand reality shows.
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    You're embarrassed by WorldStarHipHop.
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    You agree with Don Lemon and/or Bill Cosby.
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    You support movies like "Red Tails" not because they're good, but because we have to make Hollywood pay attention.
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    In public, you're careful to order a wine that is NOT moscato.
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    And you never drink house liquor.
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    You usually get bottle service anyway.
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    You enjoy the musical stylings of KEM.
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    You refuse to eat at places like Applebee’s or T.G.I. Friday’s.
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    You learned to play tennis or golf for “networking” purposes.
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    You share inspirational quotes on Instagram.
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    You celebrate Kwanzaa.
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    You throw or attend events such as Sip ‘n’ Sees.
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    You had a debutante ball or cotillion.
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    You have vacationed at Martha's Vineyard or the Hamptons.
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    You live in Atlanta or D.C.
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    You've been to Red Rooster.
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    You own a luxury car.
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    You believe that not being like “most black people” is a compliment/pickup line.
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    You've gotten a weave that cost several hundred dollars.
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    You think perms, weaves, and wigs are a sign of self-hatred.
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    You have a passport.
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    You regularly vacation in the Caribbean.
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    You're obsessed with Starbucks.
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    You LIVE for brunch.
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    You believe that people can pull themselves up by their bootstraps.
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    You're a Republican.
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    You consider yourself more “spiritual” than religious.
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    You're proud of the fact that you know how to swim.
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    You enjoy going boating and/or on cruises.
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    You own boat shoes even though you never go boating.
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    You love spoken word.
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    You attend functions with the words "grown and sexy" in the title.
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    And day parties.
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    And especially all-white parties.
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    You wear heels and designer sunglasses with every outfit, including sweatpants.
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    You own a pair of linen pants.
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    You own an article of clothing made out of seersucker.
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    You wear ascots.
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    And bow ties.
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    And bow ties with suspenders.
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    You own a tuxedo.
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    You sometimes wear your sweater tied around your shoulders.
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    You own an expensive watch.
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    And you're really proud of owning an expensive watch.
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    You own a briefcase.
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    You dress your dog.
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    You avoid places that “certain types” of black people frequent.
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    You send or will send your kids to private school.
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    You start debates about politics so you can show your sparkling wit and intelligence.
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    You believe that dinner and a movie is too basic for a date.
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    You think people should stop giving their children “urban” or “ethnic” names.
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    You made it a point to give your kids Afrocentric names (or will whenever you have kids).
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    You've adopted a simpler version of your “urban” name.
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    You love coffee shops and tea lounges.
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    You only drink Perrier/Pellegrino/Smart Water.
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    You put smoked turkey in your collard greens instead of pork.
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    You eat your fried chicken with a fork and knife (if you still eat fried chicken, that is).
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    You avoid eating soul food, but make an exception on Thanksgiving.
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    You have accepted kale as your lord and savior.
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    You shop at Whole Foods.
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    You drink only non-dairy milk (almond, soy, etc.).
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    You just love fro-yo.
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    You eat only organic foods.
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    You're gluten-free.
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    You're a vegetarian or a vegan.
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    You do Bikram yoga.
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    You just love a green smoothie.
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    You're actually on a juice cleanse right now.
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    You own vinyl records even though you’re not a DJ.
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    You think the second Aunt Viv was better than the first one.
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    You get LIVID when people don’t RSVP.
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    You subscribe to Cigar Aficionado or GQ magazine.
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    You work in corporate America.
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    You are a blogger.
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    You are in a book club.
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    You've taken a DNA test to help determine your ancestry.
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    You have given someone the "twice as good" lecture.
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    You think that young kids today need to pull up their pants and wear clothes that fit.
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    You have stopped enjoying something (like Moscato) when it's mentioned in a rap song.
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    You refuse to do the wobble or the Electric Slide at your family reunion.
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    You have Afrocentric art in your home.
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    You have tried, and failed, to NOT dance to "Wipe Me Down."
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    You find being called "bougie" offensive.
 
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