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18 Glasgow Quirks That Confuse The Fuck Out Of The Rest Of The UK

Sticking political slogans on every wall is a bit odd; other cities just use Twitter.

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2. Eating fritter rolls.

Instagram: @darrylmcindoe95_

No one else really seems to appreciate a fritter roll as much as we do. Possibly because we're Jedi masters at digesting carbs, and deep-fried slices of potato in batter surrounded by buttered bread are the carbiest carbs of all.

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4. Ice cream vans that sell random household things.

Glasgow Ice Cream Van #OnlyInGlasgow #IceCreamVan #NaeTic

Glasgow ice cream vans are basically mobile corner shops. Non-Glaswegians get surprised when they see them out in winter: "OMG it's too cold for ice cream". Don't worry, people are just shopping for fags and (back in the day) drugs.

6. Drinking things that would kill most people.

Twitter: @JohnMcGuire94

Our love of Buckfast knows no bounds, which is weird because it's made by monks in Devon, who don't drink it because it's lethal stuff. They probably invented it to use as industrial-grade disinfectant and confession-booth cleaner.

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8. Eating dinners that look like this.

Twitter: @bobby__peru

We eat like we have a death wish. Can you imagine this being served in England? "What can I get for you, prithee?" "Put every item of greasy food you can find into a pizza box, Jeeves, I shall dine upon that this eve." "A splendid choice, sir."

10. The whole "yer da sells avon" thing.

It's an insult that's got so out of hand that it isn't even insulting anymore. Also, what's wrong with dads selling Avon anyway? It's a useful source of income. Like everything, its sole use now is to baffle outsiders: That's basically what we live for.

11. Extremely impolite pubs.

Most pubs in the UK don't bully punters with insulting signs, however, thanks to our love of booze pubs definitely have the upper hand in Glasgow. "You want some beer? Yeah? YEAH? Well do what you're fuckin' told." "OK pub."

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12. Rude shop names.

imgur.com

It sort of goes hand-in-hand with the swearing and the cheeky pub signs, but we just don't seem to care about being very publicly rude. Can you imagine if a shop with this name tried to open in Bath or Cambridge? The police would be called.

15. And constantly holding huge rallies in the city centre.

Twitter: @GlasgowCityNews

Almost every time you pass George Square there are about 1,000 people in it protesting something or other. OBVIOUSLY it's great that we're a city full of folk who love to voice their opinions, but almost every day? That's pretty weird.

16. 24-hour Greggs (with bouncers).

Instagram: @timwestwoodtv

Our love of Greggs is unrivalled anywhere apart from Newcastle. Hardly any other towns have 24-hour branches, and virtually none have bouncers to protect the precious, precious sausage rolls. Glasgow is such a special city.

17. Using the subway to get wasted.

Twitter: @stuartdblack

Subcrawls are such an iconic part of Glasgow life it's easy to take them for granted, but what other places use their subway to get pissed? If people tried this on the Tube the police would show up and get shouty. Here, it's just a way of life.

18. And just being absolutely sound as fuck.

commons.wikimedia.org / Creative Commons / Facebook: Ashleigh Collins

Nowhere else in the UK has such a heavy concentration of sound, friendly, caring c*nts. Glasgow really is totally unique, mainly thanks to the people who live in it.