1.
Nairn Beach: "Inedible"
2.
Holyrood Palace: "A sandwich of oil and salt"
3.
Camera Obscura: "A buffalo for tourists"
4.
Loch Ness: "Hole hole, despite what the hole"
5.
Eilean Donan castle: "Fake like Judas"
6.
Arthur's Seat: "No roller coaster"
7.
Plockton Harbour: "Too sunny"
8.
The Fairy Pools: "Annoying"
9.
Edinburgh Castle: "Hello hello what"
10.
Dean Gallery: "If I took a dump..."
11.
The Forth Bridge: "A train bridge ah ha ha"
12.
Culloden: "Very bored off it"
13.
The Clachaig Inn: "Midgets"