How An Inspirational Stock Photo Woman Eats Every Day
Look at my orange.
I usually wake up at 5:30am, and start the day (as I'm sure everyone does), by throwing banknotes into the air while wearing my favourite carnival costume.
Then, it's time for my other favourite morning activity: Being upside down with my bum out.
At 7am I break my fast with a single half orange, which I just show to people.
Then I wake my 48-month-old son Zucchini and make him some morning salad.
Once Zuke has finished refusing to eat his probiotic-rich, mineralising breakfast, it's time for the school run.
My first task when I arrive at work is usually having something explained to me by a man.
Next, it's time to laugh at a senior male colleague's joke.
For lunch, I usually show people a melon while giving them a thumb's up.
Sometimes, a friend joins me to gossip about salad while a sensible man works in the background.
After lunch, it's straight back to being confused by pieces of paper again.
After picking up Zukey at 5pm, I prepare a quick pre-dog yoga dinner of raw leaves and brain dust.
Then, I eat a bowl of measuring tapes.
From 7 to 9pm, I take my dog Cordyceps to his yoga class with his go-to teacher, Harijiwan.
At 11pm I usually feel like I deserve a treat, so I permit myself to touch some toast before turning in.
Then, I put on my outdoor clothes, find a comfortable wall, prop my head against a pillow, and go to sleep.
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