1. Secretary of the Interior @FUCKFEMINIZM93 twitter.com Since @FUCKFEMINIZM93's nomination to head the Department of the Interior last week, much has been made of his statements to the press about sending every 13-year-old boy in America to "kill all of the bears, every last one, so that boys might learn to become real men." @FUCKFEMINIZM93 has been lying low since the controversial statements, but was spotted yesterday dining alone at a Hooters, weeping softly. 2. Secretary of State @deplorable_douche69 twitter.com Renowned for his multi-part, all-caps tweetstorms on the foreign policy issues of the day, @deplorable_douche69 is "number one at sticking it to China on Twitter dot com," Trump told reporters. 3. Secretary of Defense @PepeArmy_1998 twitter.com Little is known about Trump's pick for defense, @PepeArmy_1998 – but some observers are saying there's been chatter of his desire for a "meme war" with Mexico. 4. Secretary of the Treasury @mypenismorepowerfulthanasword twitter.com "Everybody's seen @mypenismorepowerfulthanasword's comments about the 'total gayness' of quantitative easing," one senior official at the Federal Reserve said recently."But he's also complained about student debt, suggesting he may be open to inflationary policies." 5. Attorney General @RacismRoxxxxxx twitter.com While @RacismRoxxxxxx was seen as a surprise pick to some, Washington insiders are intrigued to see what fresh new approaches to justice @RacismRoxxxxxx might bring. 6. Secretary of Agriculture @weed_supremacist666 twitter.com It is thought that the priority of @weed_supremacist666 at the Department of Agriculture will be to smoke weed and be a white supremacist. 7. Secretary of Labor @thereichstuff7 twitter.com Tweeting in the dead of night, future Secretary of Labor @thereichstuff7 believes "its time to put cucks back to work agn."When asked to elaborate the details of this policy, @thereichstuff7 said only that he believes we should "make America great again." 8. Secretary of Health and Human Services @DickSupreme twitter.com "Bros should be healthy," Twitter user and future Secretary of Health and Human Services @DickSupreme told reporters today. "No bitches fucking shit up," he continued. 9. Secretary of Housing and Urban Development @hellfire4sinners2020 twitter.com "I believe that the only way to solve this country's homelessness epidemic is with a vigorous and well-funded effort to construct new, affordable housing in every city," said Trump's HUD pick, @hellfire4sinners2020, raising hopes among many that he may bring a more moderate, even progressive voice to the cabinet.However, these hopes were dashed when @hellfire4sinners2020 tweeted then deleted the message "y have hoemless ppl to all be so lazy unlike real americans" at 3am last night. 10. Secretary of Transportation @TRUMPTRAINCONDUCTOR twitter.com President-elect Trump announced his pick for transport with great enthusiasm, bursting into a press conference and shouting to the assembled media, "THIS IS A MAN WHO CONDUCTED THE TRUMP TRAIN, AND NOW HE WILL DO A FANTASTIC JOB CONDUCTING THE TRAIN WE CALL AMERICA. TREMENDOUS. GREAT." Trump took no questions, leaving the room while pumping his fist and screaming "CHOOOO, CHOOOOOOOO!!!!" 11. Secretary of Energy @deplorable_douche70 twitter.com Nobody has ever seen or met @deplorable_douche70 in real life. It is suspected he may be a bot – raising fears that future Secretary of State @deplorable_douche69 may also be a bot. 12. Secretary of Education @rites4wites twitter.com "We shud not teech childkren to spell," nominee for secretary of the Department of Education @rites4wites tweeted today. "We shud teech them 2 fite." 13. Secretary of Veterans Affairs @PureMasculine88 twitter.com Raising concerns among some veterans as to his suitability for the role, Twitter user @PureMasculine88 has only ever tweeted once, saying, "the veteran said my dog had cancer and I shall have my revenge." 14. Secretary of Commerce Account Suspended twitter.com This account has been suspended. Learn more about why Twitter suspends accounts, or return to your timeline. 15. Secretary of Homeland Security @Nazi twitter.com Trump's nominee to head of the Department of Homeland Security, Twitter user @Nazi, is quite simply a Nazi.