Buzz·Posted on 8 Aug 201721 Incredibly Useful Skills Only A Cat Owner Would Know AboutYou are the master of a one-way conversation.by Gena-mour BarrettBuzzFeed StaffFacebookPinterestTwitterMailLink 1. Petting your cat in just the right place, so they don't lash out and attack you. Adam Ellis / BuzzFeed 2. Which means avoiding the stomach at ALL costs. Zoe Burnett / BuzzFeed Every cat owner knows going for the belly means certain death, so do it at your own peril. 3. And knowing the difference between what is too much and just enough attention. Flo Perry / BuzzFeed It's important to get the right balance. 4. Having a one-way conversation and being completely fine with it. Flo Perry / BuzzFeed Your cat is an animal of very, very few words, but that's OK because you'll speak enough for the both of you. 5. Sneezing in the most discreet way possible so you don't scare the living daylights out of your cat. imgur.com "ACHOO!!!!" "OMG, I'm sorry, kitty! Come back!" 6. And eating your food strategically so you don't have to share it with incoming cat paws. Hannah Hillam / BuzzFeed 7. Making peace with the fact your bed is no longer your bed. citizenkaneisabadmovie.tumblr.com You'll never sleep alone again. 8. Convincing yourself that a bite means they love you. Maritsa Patrinos / BuzzFeed 9. And that a deathly stare doesn't necessarily mean they're going to kill you. reddit.com Although it really looks like it. 10. Staying verrrrryyyyy still when a cat has decided to sit on you. Loryn Brantz / BuzzFeed As soon as you've been chosen, it's game over. 11. And holding your pee for as long as you possibly can. Hannah Hillam / BuzzFeed There's nothing worse than ruining an otherwise beautiful moment. 12. Accepting that the bathroom will probably never be a private place again. imgur.com Expect scratches on the door if you try to shut them out. 13. Typing with one hand because your cat's decided to take a nap on one of them while you're on your laptop. imgur.com 14. Or having very limited ability to work at all, and somehow still making it work. Alex Finnis / BuzzFeed 15. Never sleeping with your feet out of the covers because you'll definitely wake up to kitty sneak attack. Flo Perry / BuzzFeed 16. Using your cat’s stomach as a cat pillow but never putting enough weight on them that you’ll hurt their lil’ stomachs. View this photo on Instagram instagram.com 17. Accepting that you'll have to get up at least three times before your cat decides whether they actually want to be let out or not. reddit.com They can rarely make up their mind, and you'll just have to live with that. 18. Becoming completely accustomed to the presence of cat hairs everywhere. Charlotte Gomez / BuzzFeed 19. And recognising that this will probably be a distinguishable part of your ~look~. Elaina Wahl / BuzzFeed The hairs will inevitably make it onto every item of clothing. 20. Becoming an expert nickname inventor. Elaina Wahl / BuzzFeed 21. And finding meaning in even the smallest displays of affection. Adam Ellis / BuzzFeed We don't deserve cats, so you're blessed to have one.