1. You know your way around alcohol better than most.
2. And you don't discriminate – you pretty much like it all.
3. You've literally never been bothered about how many calories are in a glass of wine.
4. And for you, the bigger the glass, the better.
5. Every occasion is an occasion to have a drink, whether happy...
6. ...Or sad.
7. So you know exactly how to comfort people when they're feeling low.
8. One of your supreme talents is being able to drink everyone else under the table.
9. And your dedication to your favourite beverage is written all over your social media.
10. So it's very easy to buy you a birthday present.
11. You probably have a fantastic display of alcohol bottles somewhere in your house.
12. And there's always a bottle of wine chilling in the fridge, ready for when you get home.
13. You've become accustomed to learning how best to open a bottle of wine without a bottle opener.
This is how you open a bottle without a bottle opener! Hahahah
14. And sticking a bottle of wine in your coat pocket when you don't have a bag.
15. This is your reaction to people who question how much you drink:
16. Or have the nerve to tell you drinking "isn't ladylike".
17. The first thing you do at any restaurant is ask for the drinks menu.
18. And your first question at any party is: "Is there any alcohol?"
19. Every now and again you may end up drinking a little more than you intended.
20. But most of the time you know your limits, and you're such a seasoned drinker that you know your alcohol will rarely betray you.
21. Because there's only one thing to do after a long, hard day:
