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21 Things You'll Only Understand If You Cycle In London

Everyone on the road is a complete idiot, apart from you obviously.

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2. Because you are just a small, soft, fleshy lump surrounded by a lot of large, hard, metal lumps.


5. And there are the idiot drivers who beep at you when you literally have no where else to go.


Do they want you to cycle on the pavement? Are they just saying hello? Is it a sexy beep? You will never know.


9. And there is a certain type of bike that you think only twats ride.

Instagram: @lexalondon

You know it's wrong but you probably either hate Boris bikes, fold up bikes, or bikes with weirdly small handle bars.

10. If other people don't kill you it feels like the pollution probably will.

Changing the filters on my cycling anti-pollution mask. This is what a few months of London air looks like:

11. Or maybe you'll just drown in the weather.

Instagram: @dizarangel

16. You've done things that you really judge other cyclists for, like cycling on the pavement or running a green man.

19. And you know it's all worth it for the time where it's sunny and you speed past a load of stationary traffic on a well built cycle lane.

Instagram: @sundays_cc

20. Or when you get to wizz through a park on your way to work.

Instagram: @de

21. And at least you don't have to get the fucking tube.

Instagram: @nicoskinner


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