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    Posted on Dec 29, 2015

    34 Reasons Why No One Should Ever Live In Hackney

    Definitely not the best part of London. Nope. For sure. Terrible.

    1. Because the streets are just so boring.

    Flickr: maureen_barlin

    Street art in Hackney Wick.

    2. And our canals are just muddy and brown.

    Flickr: maureen_barlin

    Street art in Hackney Wick.

    3. Because the parks are all really ugly.

    Flickr: zongo

    Clissold Park

    4. Seriously, they look terrible all year round.

    Flickr: zongo

    Clissold Park

    5. Because it's way too polluted for any wildlife to thrive.

    Flickr: davidesimonetti

    Hackney Marshes

    6. Definitely wouldn't want this guy to be your neighbour.

    7. This chap looks like a pest.

    Flickr: davidesimonetti

    Hackney Marshes

    8. And it's all just so unpicturesque.

    Flickr: onourtravels

    East End River Walkway

    9. Because no one should ever have to live this close to a canal.

    10. They're just such an eyesore.

    11. Because industrial buildings are just so bland and underwhelming.

    Flickr: dgeezer

    Regents Canal

    12. Ew.

    Flickr: teflon

    Regents Canal

    13. Because there's nothing you'd want to buy in our markets.

    Flickr: kaze-wo-atsumete / Creative Commons

    Ridley Road Market

    14. Six metres of gorgeous fabric for £5.99? You're alright.

    Flickr: 53893059@N05

    Ridley Road Market

    15. Nope, don't want to eat those.

    Flickr: scratch_n_sniff

    Broadway Market

    16. Because there's just no history in Hackney.

    Flickr: duncan

    Broadway Market

    17. Because who would want to swim in a 50m outdoor heated pool in the heart of London?

    Flickr: purpaboo / Creative Co

    London Fields Lido

    18. Because instead of a king living inside this castle, it's just a boring rock climbing centre, open to everyone.

    Flickr: zongo / Creative C

    Castle Climbing Centre, Green Lanes

    19. Because the Hackney Empire definitely doesn't put on the best pantomime in London every single year.

    Flickr: wirewiping

    Hackney Empire

    20. Because you can't get a good pizza anywhere.

    Sodo Pizza

    21. Because a good fry-up just doesn't exist in Hackney.

    Flickr: nnova

    The Shepherdess Cafe, City Road

    22. And nobody even knows what a roast is.

    Flickr: 55935853@N00

    The Kenton, Kenton Road

    23. Because street food is all the rage in Hackney, and that stuff is gross.

    Flickr: 4_s4m

    Street Feast, Dalston Yard

    24. And everyone knows that pubs with massive gardens suck.

    Flickr: lainepubco

    The People's Park Tavern

    25. Because Hackney is just full of warehouses and tower blocks.

    Flickr: londonmatt

    Aziziye Mosque, Dalston

    26. And everything else is just chain shops.

    Flickr: 53893059@N05

    Ridley Road Market

    27. Because the Overground is definitely worse than the tube in every single way.

    Flickr: chris_baines

    Hackney Wick

    28. No one would want to cross this bridge every day.

    Flickr: 55935853@N00

    Overground bridge, De Beauvoir Town

    29. Would rather be in a tunnel.

    30. Because nothing happens in Hackney.

    Flickr: bowbrick

    Queue for Radio 1's Hackney Weekend

    31. Because there are no views in Hackney.

    32. And it's all so grey.

    Flickr: eviltwin

    Regents Canal

    33. Because you definitely couldn't do this in Hackney.

    Flickr: dgeezer

    Hackney Marshes mountain bike trail

    34. So whatever you do, never live in Hackney.

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