The Definitive Ranking Of Animals Riding On Turtles*

Slow ride. Take is easy. ♫ (*I realize most of these are tortoises. Spare me, internet commenters).

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11. Shiba

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I bet you thought I was going to make a "doge" joke. Well, you're much wrong. This shiba's doing alright, despite the "how in the hecky did I even get up here" look on his furry face.

1. Chicken

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Remember that scene in Dirty Dancing when Johnny and Baby finally nail the lift and "I Had The Time Of My Life" crescendos in the background and you have to turn away from the TV because the tears are flowing, man, it's just too beautiful? That's how I feel when I look at this chicken. Brava!