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17 Short, Clean Jokes

Just in case you need a laugh today. Via /r/askreddit.

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1. I bought the world's worst thesaurus yesterday.

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2. I have the heart of a lion

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3. I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows on too high.

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By mijazma.

4. Why don't blind people typically skydive?

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5. I just read a book about Stockholm Syndrome.

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By bigpawz.

6. A termite walks into a bar.

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By noraamitt.

7. What did the pirate say when he turned 80?

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By big-migz.

8. What do we want? "Another question!" When do we want it?

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9. Two drums and a cymbal fall out of a tree.

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By oddfeesh.

10. What do you call a fake noodle?

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By n*ggawolf.

11. Did you hear the rumor going around about butter?

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12. Do you know why you never see elephants hiding up in trees?

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13. What's red and smells like blue paint?

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14. Why can't you trust a tree on a sunny day?

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15. What happened to the cow that tried to jump over the barbed wire fence?

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By cbiscuity.

16. Do you know what my grandfather said to me before he kicked the bucket?

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17. A ghost walks into a bar and orders a shot of vodka.

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