back to top

Everything In The Amazon Rainforest Wants To Kill You

So maybe don't go there.

Posted on

The Amazon is a rainforest in South America and it's big enough to be its own country.

Can you imagine how awesome the election for President of the Amazon would be? Jaguars running against monkeys and shit? And you thought American politics were cut-throat.


Seriously, even the PLANTS in the Amazon would love the chance to end you.

This curare plant paralyzes your respiratory system but keeps your heart beating so that you suffocate to death while staying conscious until the last seconds. That's some serious Saw shit.

The craziest part is scientists estimate that a new species is discovered every three days in the Amazon.

So it's really anyone's guess what other toothy, clawy, poisony deathbeast is just chilling in there, waiting to gobble you up.