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    17 Cultured As Fuck Things To Do In London This Halloween

    It's never too late for Halloween plans.

    1. Spooky patisserie at Dominique Ansel.

    Dominique Ansel

    Look at this spooky lil guy. Sitting there on his lil chocolate mousse cake, all spooky. He's LITERALLY so cute that I could eat him up with a spoon. And once I'm done with him I'll move onto his friends, a lil jack o' lantern religieuse filled with blood orange jam and blueberry ganache, and a graveyard cake with salted butter cookie tombstones. Wow, that got dark quickly.

    When: available from 27th to 31st October

    Price: from £6

    Location: Belgravia

    Call 020 7324 7705 to pre-book

    2. An Evil Moo burger at Mac 'n' Wild.

    3. Halloween cookie pizza at Blondies Kitchen.

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    Halloween? Good. Cookies? Good. Pizza? GOOD. This little spot in Selfridges is doing a glorious Halloween-themed cookie pizza and I honestly don't know what there is to dislike about those three things. It's £30 for a whole one which isn't mega-cheap, but you can also buy by the slice. And what better way to spend Halloween than in a cookie-fuelled coma?

    When: until 31st October

    Price: £30

    Location: Selfridges

    4. Halloween Afternoon Tea at Conrad London St. James.

    Conrad London St. James

    The Conrad is Halloween-ising their usual afternoon tea, and it will be rife with the most adorable of spooky little bites, like the above skulls pops. I love Halloween, I love afternoon tea and I love extremely cute themed food, so this is the perfect trifecta for me.

    When: 28th to 31st October

    Price: £35

    Location: Westminster

    Book here

    5. Pumpkin carving brunch at Drink Shop Do.

    6. A Haunted House at Balls & Company.

    Balls & Company

    This one is two-fold. You can either book dinner at Balls & Company's "haunted house", which is a Halloween set menu that includes things like chargrilled octopus, squid ink gnocchi, polenta ghosts, "slime" filled Scream Puffs and raspberry worms with brownie mud. Cocktails are also included, and sound divine: there's a blood orange, mescal and tequila "Perfect Murder", a whisky, ginger and sweet vermouth "Root of All Evil", and a brandy, passionfruit, spiced rum and soda "Final Destination". I can confirm the food at Balls & Company is very delicious, so their themed-menu should be the perfect combo of creative but still tasty.

    If you just like the sound of the cocktails though, you can buy a ticket to the bar downstairs for a tenner, which includes a drink and gummy teeth infused with vodka and blackcurrant.

    When: 31st October

    Price: entry to the bar is £10, which includes a cocktail, and the set dinner upstairs is £38

    Location: Soho

    Book dinner here and bar entry here

    7. The Death Express at London Dungeon.

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    London Dungeon may seem like an obvious choice for Halloween, but there's an extra reason you should visit this year – they've commandeered the Necropolis Railway and turned it into their "Death Express". Not heard of the Necropolis Railway? It's a line that ran from 1854 to 1941 to transport the dead and their loved ones to the cemetary and back again, and is possibly one of London's most spooky lines. It's being incorporated into the London Dungeon's usual run for a limited time, and you should definitely take the opportunity to go for a ride.

    When: until November 6th

    Price: tickets from £21

    Location: Southbank

    Book here

    8. A spooky rooftop brunch party at Madison.

    9. Dark Serve ice cream at Four Winters.

    10. La Danse Macabre at The Curtain.

    The Curtain

    This is a great pick if you want a night that's a step above the average club night. A private members club, The Curtain has put aside a set number of tickets to their "Danse Macabre" Halloween party for non-members. It's a costume party that runs until 3am, and there'll be tarot card readings and a cabaret show, alongside other live entertainment. And at £30 for a live show, a cocktail, canapes and access to a swanky private party, it's not bad price-wise at all.

    When: Saturday 28th October

    Price: £30, which includes a welcome drink and canapes

    Location: Shoreditch

    Book here

    11. Halloween cakes at Flavourtown.

    Flavourtown

    Ok, yes, I'm going to get this out the way. The cake is £50. There, I said it. I'M SORRY I KNOW THAT'S SO MUCH MONEY. But also, oh my god look at it. It's called the "Zombicorn" and has handmade Belgian chocolate bark, ghostly meringue kisses and flecks of raspberry blood. And come on, if you have £50 what would you rather spend it on? Sensible, practical things like a new pair of winter boots or a week's grocery shop? OR A BEAUTIFUL HALLOWEEN CAKE THAT YOU TAKE HOME AND EAT ALL BY YOURSELF WITH THE CURTAINS DRAWN. We both know the answer, friends. We both know.

    If you don't have fifty quid to blow on a cake of dreams though, Flavourtown are also doing beautiful Halloween cupcakes, which I have included a picture of below. They're still not cheap at £20, but you *should* be able to share a box of cupcakes with someone which lessens the cost. If you choose not to share though you'll find no judgement here.

    When: no end date yet

    Price: £50 for the cake, cupcake boxes from £20

    Where: Spitalfields

    Pre-order here

    Flavourtown

    12. A Crazy Circus Party at Pop Brixton.

    Pop Brixton

    There are plenty of Halloween parties going on this weekend in London, but if you want something a bit different that won't break the bank, then Pop Brixton is your guy. Their Halloween party will have all the elements of any other good party; lots of people, dancing, copious amounts of drinking; but also has immersive circus performers, aerial artists and live bands. The acts include a Balkan band, a New Orleans orchestra and a "vaudevillian troop", and I'm not sure what exactly that means but I'm into it.

    When: Saturday 28th October

    Price: £5

    Location: Brixton

    Book here

    13. Trick or Treat tipples at Plateau.

    14. A Halloween Drag Queen dining experience at The Ivy.

    Thy Ivy, The Ivy

    The Ivy hosts a regular drag queen brunch (because why not), and is doing a special Halloween-themed dinner version this year. It's pretty simple: book in for dinner on Halloween, and you'll be privy to a spectacular rendition of The Rocky Horror Picture Show by Tiffaney Wells and Adora Dix, two champions of the Drag world.

    There's also a pretty glorious "ghoulish" take on their famous chocolate bombe dessert, which features pumpkin, honeycomb, popping candy and hot treacle sauce.

    When: 31st October

    Price: starters from £5.50 and mains from £12.75. Chocolate Bombe is 8.50

    Location: Soho

    Book here

    15. Ghostbusters and cocktails at One Aldwych.

    16. A ghoulish cocktail tour with Death's Door Spirits.

    designmynight.com

    If you like cocktails and ghost stories HAVE I GOT THE THING FOR YOU. Ahem. Death's Door Spirits (very apt name there guys) is running a special Halloween-themed ghost walk that includes stops at three cocktail bars. The bars on the tour are excellent – City Social in particular is one of my favourite bars in the city, and has beautiful panoramic views of London. The tour is also great value, as you get three drinks, nibbles included. FYI, drinks at each bar are about a tenner a pop, so you're basically getting everything else on top for free.

    When: Saturday 28th and Tuesday 31st October

    Price: from £20

    Location: East London

    Book here

    17. Burgers and a Halloween Bash at Dirty Bones.

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