1. No, there is not a gun in Chris Hemsworth's underwear, he's just very pleased to see you.
2. Justin Theroux is thinking about how amazing you were last night and has had to go for a run to work off some of the tension.
3. Joe Jonas just wanted to check in to see how your day's going, and just hearing your voice is making him very happy.
4. Prince Harry was just trying to play a nice game of football when he caught sight of you cheering him on, and BOOM.
5. Ryan Reynolds heard that you were at home waiting for him, and he legit left work, undressed and ran home.
Hello there, both Ryans.
6. Then there's The Game who can't control himself whenever you walk into a room.
7. Michael Fassbender was trying to be professional at a film premiere, but he got distracted at the thought of seeing you later and making you feel like the Queen you are.
8. Benedict Cumberbatch was just trying to do an interview, and then he remembered that he's going to give you a relaxing massage later. There was just no going back.
9. Meanwhile Jon Hamm was just trying to do a bit of shopping when you popped into his mind and every part of him got immediately excited.
10. Most of the time you're not with him, David Gandy just lies in bed wishing you were there.
And when you are, he's goddamn overjoyed.
11. Jake Gyllenhaal just can't get over how completely amazing you look.
12. And Matthew Lewis cannot believe how lucky he is to get to spend ~quality time~ with you.
13. Scott Disick didn't bother to get changed out of his pyjamas because he knows he'll just be spending the day in bed with you.
14. And Chris Pratt has rhythm like no one else you've ever met.
And excellent hip action. Which, you know, is handy.
15. Harry Judd just can't help but tell everyone that every part of him is obsessed with you.
16. Daniel Craig went for a dip in the sea and then caught sight of you on the beach and now he would like to propose marriage immediately.
17. BOB is just texting you to tell you he's arranged a surprise fancy dinner for you tonight, and he's already excited for ~dessert~.
18. And, finally, there's Jamie Dornan who's never felt this strongly about anyone before and the proof is literally right there.
RIP you.
