People Are Revealing The Shocking Costs Of Being A Bridesmaid, And Now I'm Rethinking My Friendships

    "It was a couple weeks after the wedding that the newlyweds started sending INVOICES to everyone to help cover the cost."

    Recently, we asked the BuzzFeed Community if they've ever been a bridesmaid, and if so, did they have to pay for anything, and what did it cost them?

    As expected, some of the responses were *wild*. Here are some of our favourite ones...

    1. "My friend lives in England and flew to the US to be a bridesmaid. She had to pay for her hair, makeup, and dress."

    "It wasn't a location wedding, the friend was American. I thought it was really cheeky making her pay for those when she spent thousands to attend already, and she isn't wealthy."


    2. "I literally had to save close to $6,000 over two years to be my friend's maid of honour."

    "Let's see where to start... I had to pay for my dress, my dress alterations, my shoes, accessories, my hair as well as my makeup – that was about $800. I threw the bridal shower by myself (the other two bridesmaids didn't help or contribute any money to the shower), which came out to about $2,000. The bachelorette/bachelor party in Vegas was about $3,000."


    3. "The happy couple paid for most things with the help of their parents, and as the wedding party, we were only expected to pay for our own room, which was discounted anyway thanks to the reception being at the hotel."

    "It was a couple weeks after the wedding that the newlyweds started sending INVOICES to everyone to help cover the cost. This involved everything it took to be a bridesmaid, including the dress, shoes, flowers, and hair and makeup. We were probably expected to pay around £1,500 each. IDK who has that lying around, but certainly not any of us."


    4. "I was maid of honour in the UK and it probably cost me less than £100 — that was mostly on gift bags, treats, and games for the hen do. I then voluntarily paid for manicures for the four women in the wedding party."

    "It would have cost more to be a guest because the lovely bride paid for my dress and hair, and I did my own makeup."


    5. "I paid for my hair and make up to be done as I'd never had it done professionally before. That cost me about £60 for both."

    "The bride bought all of our dresses — I asked why she didn't want me to give her money and she said it was traditional for the bride to buy the dresses for the maids. So, yeah, it was pretty cheap!"


    6. "Just the hen do, really. For my sister's wedding, she paid for the bridesmaids dresses, shoes, nails, jewellery, makeup, hair, and accommodation."

    "I can’t imagine a bride expecting the bridesmaids to pay for everything themselves. Like… It’s not *their* wedding?? Hen parties are the expensive part!"


    7. "One hen do, it must have been £1,000. It shouldn't cost so much to be in a bridal party, and it's the main reason why I now loathe hen do's."


    8. "I spent probably around $500ish, which was a lot for a 21-year-old college student who could only work part time. It was so not worth it. Bride got pissed because they stopped making the dress, and they no longer had my size in the right color."


    9. "$500, plus extra because I'm plus sized. So yeah, wouldn't recommend being a bridesmaid, tbh."


    10. "I was a bridesmaid last year to a great friend and she was really, really conscious about costs for us. With that being said, I still spent close to 3K on her wedding."

    "It cost about 1k for three nights in Miami, $500 for the flight to her wedding, $300 for the dress (including alterations), $75 for shoes, $100 for hair, and makeup. On top of that, we had to get countless Ubers, a rental car, and we paid $600 for the hotel during the wedding weekend."


    11. "I've been in a wedding where I didn't have to pay for my hair, makeup, or dress, but I had to pay over $1,500 for flight and accommodations."

    "I've been in another where the bride expected the bridesmaids to pay for literally everything, including their arbor and aisle decorations and bathroom baskets for guests. I've been in another where I paid for the dress and bachelorette, but hair and makeup were "gifted." It all depends on how greedy/stuck up or chill the bride is."


    12. "I was asked to be a bridesmaid for my friend who wanted a destination wedding. It meant that the ceremony was small, but so was her budget. There were still eight bridesmaids and she said that it was too expensive to fund everything for all of us."

    "We were expected to pay for our own flights (bearing in mind the wedding was in California so to fly from UK is already quite expensive). We didn't have to pay for our dresses, but we did have to pay for any alterations and our flowers. In terms of where we were staying, we also had to pay for our room.

    Only four out of eight bridesmaids could afford to go to the wedding, I was lucky in the sense that I had a fair amount of savings that I decided to use for this special day. I'd say I ended up parting with around £2,000-£3,000."


    13. "I've been a bridesmaid and wedding guest several times. My husband and I are from opposite sides of the country, both with large families and friend groups. The majority of weddings we've been to required a flight. Any out of town wedding I've ever attended is at least four figures."


    14. "Including my own wedding, I've been to six weddings and have another coming up in May. Typically, I buy a dress for $150-200, shoes for $50-80, hair/makeup around $200, and manicure/pedicure for $120."

    "If the wedding is on a Saturday night, you take off of work on Friday to attend the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner. Hotel accommodations and Ubers for two days depending on the area can run you about $400."


    15. "I was my sister's maid of honour and I probably spent $800 on everything from my dress, shoes, accessories, hotel room, to her bachelorette party."

    "I refused to let her pay during her bachelorette party and all the other bridesmaids were super sweet and chipped in to help cover her cost. My sister let us pick our dresses within a color scheme and the hotel was very nice, but discounted.

    I love reading about the drama of nightmare brides and grooms; I would drop those people so fast. My sister's wedding was an absolutely magical day, and there was no drama, issues, meltdowns, or anything. Truly proves there's no excuse to become a different (and usually worse) person just because it's your 'special day.'"


    16. "I was a bridesmaid back in 2016. I only had to pay for my dress, plus hair and makeup. It all cost a total of approximately $400, which is cheap compared to other prices I've heard of."

    "Definitely not worth it in the end – the marriage didn't even last a year!"


    17. "I run a wedding coordinating business. When talking about who pays, it's all over the place, but I have seen an increase in brides paying for things like hair and makeup for bridal party."

    "Dresses are still typically paid for by the bridesmaids and the bachelorette getaway is usually spilt between the whole party, sans the bride. I've had a bride who required her bridesmaids to buy a $500 dress and get extensions to make all their hair the same length. A wedding should be a special day, but the goal is not to make your friends and family broke!"


    18. "I've given my bridesmaids free reign. Yes, they're paying for their dress and hair and makeup, but it's all their choice. They're picking their own dress, so it doesn't matter if it's only $20."

    "And the hair and makeup is optional. If they want to get it done, great. If not, okay. I was a bridesmaid and spent about $600 between everything. It was $600 I could not afford."


    19. "I literally spent more on being a bridesmaid in my best friend's wedding than I did on my own wedding in its entirety."

    "Destination bachelorette and destination wedding (so flights, accommodations, food, activities, etc.), dress, shoes, jewellery, hair, and makeup. Her wedding was perfect, but it was pricey. That said, I regret nothing as I can (and do) reuse anything I wore. We got an amazing vacation to a place I've always wanted to go, and most importantly, her wedding was perfect and she was so happy."


    20. "I was a bridesmaid for my good friend this summer, and honestly she was a dream bride. I only had to pay for my dress and shoes, which came to about $120. She covered makeup, flowers, nails, and even boarding."

    "I'm not even upset that I spent $400 on a plane ticket because it was so worth it to be with her on her big day. I can only hope I'll be that accommodating when I'm a bride."


    21. "I spent, like, 3k on a wedding last year as a bridesmaid to one of my best friends. It was exhausting."

    "I declined when another friend asked me to be her bridesmaid. I'm also eloping in December because I cant be arsed to do that to my friends."


    H/T to the BuzzFeed Community for sharing all your responses!

    Note: Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.  

    Let us know in the comments if you've had a similar experience!