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    No One Asked, But I Ranked All The Minor "Mean Girls" Characters From Worst To Best


    The holiday season is quickly approaching, which means it's time for my annual rewatch of my favorite Christmas movie: Mean Girls.

    Paramount Pictures

    On this most recent rewatch, I truly appreciated all the minor characters in film, so I decided to power rank all of the minor characters (five lines or less) from worst to best:

    27. Coach Carr:

    Coach Carr teaching sex ed
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    Not only is he AWFUL at teaching sex ed, he's also a predator. He SHOULD be in jail. 

    26. Jason:

    Jason looking at Cady
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    I just KNOW that Mr. Butter-Your-Muffin would have defended Coach Carr / blamed the underaged girls for being preyed on by him. Don't forget that he cheated on Gretchen with Taylor Weddell! He deserved that radio to the face. 

    25. The kid with the mom who has long chest hair:

    A douchebag bullying Janis in homeroom
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    No one likes a bully! Unless that bully is Regina George. 

    24. Shane Oman:

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    Like, it's pretty fucked up that he was hooking up with his teammate's girlfriend behind his back.

    23. These collective teachers:

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    If these were my pick of teachers, I would simply transfer schools.

    22. Seth Mosakowski:

    Karen talking to Gretchen in her mouse ears
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    Don't hookup with your first cousin. 

    21. These weird religious kids:

    Five overzealous religious youths
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    I mean they think that guns were created to kill the this kinda speaks for itself. 

    20. Kristen Hadley:

    Kristen looking at Cady like she has three heads
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    Sorry that Cady was just tryna be nice! No need to threaten bodily harm!

    19. Dawn Schweitzer:

    Dawn looking down at a piece of paper
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    While I don't condone violence, the first hit that Dawn threw DID lead to my favorite line of all time, so she's higher than Kristen. (The line was Mr. Duvall's "Oh, hell nah, I did not leave the South Side for this.") 

    18. The spelling-bee freak:

    Nerdy girl at a spelling bee
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    IDK man, she just rubbed me the wrong way. You can just tell that she's a brownnoser. 

    17. The Marymount mathletes:

    The Marymount mathletes luring at Cady
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    Again, BROWN-NOSERS! 

    16. Caroline Krafft:

    Caroline Krafft approaching the mathlete statium
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    She's probs a brownnoser, too, but I sympathize with her a bit more since she's the only girl on the mathletes team. 

    15. The dude who farts a lot:

    A kid looking behind him in class
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    As someone with IBS, I can relate to this man. But also, when in public, you gotta clench, my dude! 

    14. The Junior Plastics:

    The three junior plastics walking through the quad
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    Listen, for all we know, they could be the nicest girls in the world! I refuse to pass judgement until I know more about them! 

    13. Taylor Weddell:

    Taylor talking to her mom on the phone
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    I feel bad for this girl! She just got caught in the crossfire. 

    12. "Danny DeVito":

    A girl telling Damien to get out of the bathroom
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    Ol' girl was just tryna wash her hands in the bathroom. 

    11. Amber D'Alessio:

    Amber denying that she made out with a hot dog
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    Can someone please explain how one — and why one — would make out with a hot dog? 

    10. The girl who Regina once punched in the face:

    A girl talking about getting punched in the face
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    "I saw Cady Heron wearing army pants and flip flops, so I bought army pants and flip flops." 

    9. The unfriendly Black hotties:

    The unfriendly black hotties giving Cady the side-eye
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    I personally really did like that one girl's skirt! 

    8. Nfume:

    Young Cady hugging a young Nfume
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    Future unfriendly Black hottie in the making. 

    7. Kristen Hadley's boyfriend:

    The redhead asking his mom to pick him up
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    This lil' boy gave us the ICONIC "Mom, can you pick me up? I'm scared." 

    6. Kylie George:

    Kylie waving to the Plastics as they enter the living room
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    Dancing queen. 

    5. Kevin Gnapoor:

    Kevin performing a rap on stage
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    I'm just glad that, in the end, this man got his "varsity" jacket. 

    4. Annfernee:

    Mr. Duvall talking to Cady
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    Homie isn't even IN the movie, and yet, he's in the top five. 

    3. The girl who doesn't even go here:

    A girl sharing her feelings on stage
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    She just has a lot of feelings, y'all!

    2. Glenn Coco:

    Damien handing Glenn Coco his four candy canes
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    Does this need an explanation? 

    1. Ol' girl from Michigan:

    Michigan girl just minding her own business in class
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    This girl did more for race relations in this one moment than most politicians do in their entire careers.