8. An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first orders a beer, the second orders half a beer, the third orders a quarter of a beer, and so on.
After the seventh order, the bartender pours two beers and says, “You fellas ought to know your limits.”
10. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.
This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
16. An MIT linguistics professor was lecturing his class the other day. “In English,” he said, “a double negative forms a positive. However, in some languages, such as Russian, a double negative remains a negative.
But there isn’t a single language, not one, in which a double positive can express a negative.”
A voice from the back of the room piped up, “Yeah, right.”
Read more here!
- Russian ambassador to the UN Vitaly Churkin has died after suffering from cardiac arrest this morning, a day before his 65th birthday.
- Donald Trump said that his comments about Sweden were referring to a Fox News segment, not an actual incident in the country 🇸🇪🙃
- Senator Ron Wyden will soon introduce legislation requiring warrants before phones can be searched at the US border.
- A girl's best friend showed up to her date in a fake mustache to spy on her and it is the definition of friendship goals 😎