1. They get off to what's "ruining" America:
baby boomers who attended college in 1682 for $19.99 swear they know exactly what millennials aren't being taught & how it's ruining America
2. They reach completion on the thought of tipping someone like shit:
From serving, I’ve noticed that millennials that are even struggling to pay bills tip at least $10. But baby boomer Susan thinks it’s amazing to keep the change and it’s $1.67.
3. They're always crankin' their damn hogs over bad investments:
I love baby boomers who say "kids don't even know how to write cursive" in a negative way like ok grandma you can't even turn your laptop on without getting 6 viruses and wiring half your retirement money to a Nigerian Prince
4. All their wifi passwords look like robot jizz:
if anyone wants to come over to my parents these weekend here's the wifi password
5. They are legitimately sexually attracted to speaking to the manager:
baby boomers: "The youth of today is so disrespectful." also baby boomers: "I asked for a burger with only ketchup, but you didn't put pickles on it and I like pickles, so I'm gonna need to scream at you until your manager offers me a coupon for a free large coffee."
6. Their email addresses might as well be carved out of stone:
Will somebody tell the Baby boomers we're not using aol email addresses anymore?
7. They can't do shit:
Baby boomers be making 170k a year and don't know how to rotate PDFs
8. They get "hacked" 3 times a day, without fail:
“Don’t open an email from me, I’ve been hacked.” -Baby Boomers
9. They ruined the FLOORS:
Baby boomers blame millennials for everything BUT WHO PUT CARPET OVER ALL THESE HARDWOOD FLOORS PATRICIA
10. They leave shopping carts around like ruined economies:
“your generation is lazy” yet all I see is babyboomers leaving their shopping carts wherever they please🤔
11. They're always blowin' their wads over department stores:
"millennials killed department stores" baby boomers killed the polar bears but right right right my deepest apologies to jc penny
12. They're always sploogin' their dungarees over houses:
13. They get fully erect over Forrest Gump for some reason:
“forrest gump” is damn near three hours of baby boomers doing what they claim to hate about millennials.
14. They're consistently hemorrhaging cum to the idea of a "the real world":
baby boomers: kiDs these dAys R STUPID & illiterate..... put down the phone & LOOK AROUND YOU its called the REAL WORLD also baby boomers: I'll give you $100 to fix my computer
15. They blow their damn horn at the thought of telling someone they're wearing ripped jeans like they don't already know:
baby boomer: why r there holes in ur jeans? u rip those urself? me (smart & woke): why r there holes in the ozone? u rip those urself?
16. They cream their pants over the thought of scolding someone about cellphones:
17. They blow their lumps at talking about how easy kids have it:
"kids these days have it too easy" said the generation that could buy a house on a wage from unskilled work at age 21
18. They produce a gallon of pajama glue over the thought of telling a younger person about how "things used to be":
Baby boomers talk a lotta shit for a generation that always needs help connecting to the wifi.
19. But, honestly, they are useful for some things:
The only thing baby boomers have to offer is their cable login
I take it all back.