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The 15 Types Of People You Meet At A College Bar

You've definitely met them all before.

1. The "Woo!" girl:

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She's loud, she's proud, and she's on her eighth tequila shot.

2. The girl in the bathroom who thinks you're sooo pretty:

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Drunk girls in bathrooms are the nicest people you'll never see again. But you'll always have that low-quality Snapchat selfie.

3. Some guy named Chad:

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You know the guy I'm talking about.

4. The birthday girl:

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If you couldn't tell by her sash and tiara, don't worry — she'll be screaming it all night while downing free drinks.

5. The guy with a tab:

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This guy will start a tab just to impress a girl or show off to his friends. Spending $312 on drinks won't be the only thing he regrets the next morning.

6. The guy who fucking loves college:

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If this guy's life had a soundtrack, it would be Asher Roth's "I Love College," no doubt about it.

7. The honorary bro:

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This girl is squad deep with her guy friends and drinks only beer.

8. The person who lost their phone:

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They'll ask everyone in the bar to look for their phone until they eventually find it in their back pocket.

9. The freshman using their fake ID for the first time:

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This kid wasn't prepared to actually get in and has no idea what drink to order. They'll probably get a vodka soda because they "just don't have the taste for beer yet."

10. The person who should have left 30 minutes ago:

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This person cannot speak coherently or walk without assistance. Eventually their slightly-less-drunk friend will get them in a cab while they scream, "Seroslllyy I'm tooottlly fynnne."

11. The kid who knows the bouncer:

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This kid has the in, which means no waiting in line and no paying cover. Probably named Chad (see #3).

12. The senior who is too cool for you:

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They're cooler than you and will make sure you know it. They're actually 21 and don't have to worry about memorizing a fake birthday and zip code. They know exactly what to order, and they drink to forget they're graduating in a matter of months.

13. The guy who can't flirt:

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BUT...listening to him ramble about his toy train collection is better than hearing about Chad's daily workout regimen.

14. The mom:

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She has tissues, snacks, and Band-Aids, and she's everyone's emergency contact. She'll spend the night wishing she could use child leashes to keep her drunk friends from wandering off.

15. The dynamic duo:

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They look the same, talk the same, and order the same drink. They got dressed together, came together, and will be attached at the hip all night — until they leave to get pizza together.

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