Concerns spiked today over the mental health of Pat Robertson of the 700 club, following his declaration that he wishes marijuana was legal. Though he has expressed this opinion before, many suspected it was just a burst of senility. But his recent interview confirms that the condition is permanent. “This is a guy who hasn’t spoken sense in decades,” a source told DAME. “Why is he starting now? We’re all very worried.”
Robertson did not reveal whether his support of the sticky icky came from a “higher power”, or from his love of early Cypress Hill. But he did say that the war on drugs is failing, and that “the tough laws are needlessly sending young people to jail.” This puts the Pastor-farian, as he's known, firmly to the left of President Obama on the issue, and squarely in bed with Willie Nelson, Woody Harrelson and the Snoopy D-O-Double Jizzle.
Doctors are concerned that if this condition is not treated, he may start believing the gays aren’t to blame for earthquakes after all.