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The 21 Most Traumatizing Things That Could Happen To Competitive People

If you're not first, you may as well fake your own death and start a new life.

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1. Getting second place IN ANYTHING.

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Even in Boggle.

2. Knowing someone is sweating harder than you at the gym.

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NAILED IT.

3. When someone is a NATURAL at something that took you YEARS to perfect.

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SHOW-OFF.

4. Being told, "You're all winners."

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NO ACTUALLY ONLY THE WINNER IS THE WINNER.

5. Having to take it "easy" because you're playing against children.

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MUST. GO. EASY.

6. Having the not-exactly-athletically-inclined person on your team.

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You can be scorekeeper.

7. Someone getting all the praise for work YOU DID.

The CW

WHAT. THE. FUCK.

8. Or getting placed in an apathetic group for a class project.

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DO YOU WANT TO GET A B?

9. Knowing someone beat you BECAUSE THEY CHEATED.

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I SAW YOU BRO.

10. Losing the fight for a prime parking spot.

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MY BLINKER WAS BLINKING FASTER.

11. Watching HELPLESSLY as someone ties your Flappy Bird high score.

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YOU LUCKED OUT.

12. When someone else has the last word.

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OH HA-EEEEEELL NO.

13. Being told to calm down.

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Life is the Olympics, you just don't realize it because you've never been on the PODIUM.

14. Getting picked LAST on a team.

Oxygen

I'M YOUR GREATEST ASSET BRO.

15. Losing and having to say "good game" REPEATEDLY to everyone on the other team.

We were WARMING UP.
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We were WARMING UP.

16. Finding out a co-worker gets paid more than you.

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HOLD UP, DIDN'T WE START AT THE SAME TIME?

17. Someone forfeiting a game that you were CLEARLY going to win.

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JUST FINISH IT, QUITTER.

18. When someone (BESIDES YOU) throws off the curve with their test score.

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TEACHER'S PET.

19. Getting disqualified from ANYTHING.

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SORRY I WANNA WIN.

20. Getting a 99%.

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Do you enjoy being a LIFE RUINER?

21. And when someone gets something you've always wanted.

TLC

Because you know the best deserves nothing but the best.

Losers to the left.

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