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Billie Lourd Opened Up To Ellen, Revealing The Loss Of Carrie And Debbie Is Still "Impossible To Deal With"

"It's completely surreal. I mean there's no way to really explain it — it's so hard to talk about."

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Billie Lourd stopped by Ellen on Tuesday to promote the latest season of American Horror Story when she opened up about the surreal reality of losing her mother, Carrie Fisher, and her grandmother, Debbie Reynolds, just one day apart last year:

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In the earnest interview, Billie first explained how she believed that working with her mom on Star Wars: The Force Awakens was an experience that was "meant to be":

"I'm a big believer in things happening for a reason, and I think I ended up in that movie for a reason. It was really incredible for us to get to have that experience together."

She then opened up to Ellen about the sudden loss of her mom and grandmother, saying it was "completely surreal" and how it's still "impossible to deal with":

"It's completely surreal. I mean there's no way to really explain it — it's so hard to talk about. If I say that I'm doing good, I'm 'too happy,' and if I say that I'm not doing good, then I'm 'a mess.' So it's really hard to know what to say about it because it is just so surreal and impossible to deal with."

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