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Are You Ready To Bottom?

Bottoms up!

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    Andrew Richard/BuzzFeed
    You know where to find someone who can top you tonight.
    You have someone coming over to top tonight.
    You made a trip to the sex shop within the past month.
    Past year.
    You own a toy made for your bum.
    You have used said toy already today to prep.
    You will use said toy later for prep.
    You will use a finger or two.
    You own some of those free lube packets you probably scored at a health clinic.
    You own water-based lube.
    You own silicone-based lube.
    You own lube that tastes like something.
    You own lube with either a heating or cooling effect.
    You own every kind of lube imaginable.
    And you've got lubricated condoms, too.
    You also have ones with a vibrating ring.
    You have a good amount of condoms in general.
    You feel relaxed.
    You will find a way to get more relaxed by tonight.
    You stretched...your legs.
    You plan to stretch.
    You did butt kegels.
    You haven't eaten greasy food within the past week.
    You haven't eaten greasy food today.
    You have bathed in the past day.
    You've rinsed off your bum thoroughly.
    You have used baby wipes on your bum in the past day.
    Your bum is groomed according to your personal preference.
    You own a pair of underwear that makes you feel sexy.
    You cleaned your room.
    You have made your bed.
    You have added fresh sheets to your bed.
    You laid out a tarp (you can never be too safe).
    You prepared a playlist for the evening.
    Your playlist includes "Push It" by Salt-N-Pepa.
    And "I Gotta Feeling" by the Black Eyed Peas because it's going to be a good, good night indeed.

Are You Ready To Bottom?

Here's the bottom line: you may be in for a sloppy rendezvous if you opt to bottom tonight. A little more planning can go a long way in making sure the experience is one to remember.

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No one can say you are the ultimate planner, but you've learned in time what works best for you and can still have a safe, enjoyable romp with your rump if you so choose.

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You are totally ready to bottom tonight. You have been planning this night for some time, and it's going to be a joyful and safe experience for you and your partner. Bottom's up!

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Every. Tasty. Video. EVER. The new Tasty app is here!

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