back to top

The 36 Struggles Of Using MyFitnessPal

"BRB I just need to go for a brisk walk so I can eat this KitKat."

Posted on

One day, you wake up in the middle of a hungover, binge-eating haze and realise your body hates you, and things have got to change.

giphy.com

"So...I've had pizza for pre-dinner, dinner, and now breakfast. OK."

So, you've downloaded the MyFitnessPal app to help keep a food diary, manage your calories, and hopefully break some bad food habits.

Cate Sevilla

These are the trials and tribulations only people who use MyFitnessPal will understand. It's an emotional, cheese-filled roller coaster.

1. When you sign up, you give the LEAST AMOUNT OF IDENTIFIABLE INFORMATION POSSIBLE.

No real names, no real photos. DO NOT CONNECT TO YOUR FACEBOOK ACCOUNT.Or if you do use your real name, have your privacy settings so high no one will ever be able to find you.
Cate Sevilla / BuzzFeed

No real names, no real photos. DO NOT CONNECT TO YOUR FACEBOOK ACCOUNT.

Or if you do use your real name, have your privacy settings so high no one will ever be able to find you.

Advertisement

2. You go about your normal eating routine, and then suddenly realise where you may have been going wrong.

instagram.com

Wait, I'm sorry, there are HOW MANY CALORIES IN THAT?!

3. Things you once thought "weren't that bad" suddenly take up a third of your daily calories.

instagram.com

WHAT THE HELL, PRET?!

4. You learn that even medication has calories.

WHAT THE FUCK, LEMSIP?!
instagram.com

WHAT THE FUCK, LEMSIP?!

5. You quickly become hangry, obsessed with finding ways to have more calories available to you and your stomach.

New Line Cinema / Giphy
Advertisement

6. You discover the simple concept of WORKING OUT – because that gives you more calories.

giphy.com

You're basically a genius gaming the system.

7. Your value system for measuring calories starts to change.

instagram.com

8. For example: "Wow, I have 755 calories left! I could get a Quarter Pounder with cheese and small fries!"

Giphy

"Why would I waste those calories on a fucking salad? AMIRITE?"

9. "If I eat this wrap for lunch, I'll have 1,080 calories left for dinner and could order a medium cheese pizza!"

Giphy

"This 'being healthy' stuff is so easy."

Advertisement

10. It's hard to not make those dreaded numbers go RED, and when you look in your "recent" foods, the truth stares back at you.

Cate Sevilla / BuzzFeed

11. You momentarily lose touch with reality, and wonder if lying to the app will help.

Is there any cheats for @MyFitnessPal all the things I'm eating have lots of calories. #myfitnesspal

Laura Robinson@SaveWithLauraFollow

Is there any cheats for @MyFitnessPal all the things I'm eating have lots of calories. #myfitnesspal

2:32 PM - 04 Feb 15ReplyRetweetFavorite

12. You come to realise that, in truth, you're not exactly being very healthy. And it's not exactly the point of why you're using this app. And then you cry.

NBC / Giphy

You cry for all the things you won't eat today. All the pizzas you won't order tonight. All those pints that will remain unconsumed.

13. Your breakfasts start to look kinda sad.

instagram.com

Sad cup of tea with skimmed milk: 11 calories.

Sad cereal bar: 131 calories.

Advertisement

14. And so do your snacks.

instagram.com

Pombears are gluten-free, so.

15. But then this happens!

instagram.com

And, suddenly, you are hooked.

16. You no longer just "cook" or "sit down and eat" — you must LOG.

my favorite part about cooking a meal is spending hours afterwards meticulously logging every single ounce into myfitnesspal

sarah jean@sarahjeanalexFollow

my favorite part about cooking a meal is spending hours afterwards meticulously logging every single ounce into myfitnesspal

9:38 PM - 30 Jan 15ReplyRetweetFavorite

Advertisement

18. Your phone slowly fills up with photos like this.

instagram.com

19. And this.

instagram.com

"Need to remember how many calories I burned."

20. And you're not above power walking around the block a few times just so you can have a damn piece of garlic bread with dinner.

"I NEED 134 MORE CALORIES GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY WAY."

21. When you eat anywhere other than your home, it can get tricky to log all the things you've consumed.

Trying to calculate my calories consumed tonight on My Fitness Pal…Should just mark it up as a loss…

Closet Bromo@ClosetBromoFollow

Trying to calculate my calories consumed tonight on My Fitness Pal…Should just mark it up as a loss…

3:42 AM - 02 Feb 15ReplyRetweetFavorite

Advertisement

22. "There's probably only, like, five calories in these, so I don't need to even add, right?"

If sweets appear in the jar but nobody can tell you what to search for on @myfitnesspal, they don't count. Right?

Chris Marritt@chrismarrittFollow

If sweets appear in the jar but nobody can tell you what to search for on @myfitnesspal, they don't count. Right?

8:13 AM - 01 Feb 15ReplyRetweetFavorite

23. But when restaurants do you a favour and put the damn calories on the menu, it makes logging your lunch 100% easier.

24. You start to feel like the app is JUDGING YOU and WATCHING SILENTLY.

I don't know how to tell @myfitnesspal about what I'm doing to my body right now #adbowl

Josh Berthume@jberthumeFollow

I don't know how to tell @myfitnesspal about what I'm doing to my body right now #adbowl

1:42 AM - 02 Feb 15ReplyRetweetFavorite

25. #judgey

Yeah, I figure my bourbon into MyFitnessPal...you wanna say somethin about it? #bwahahaha

The Golden Glamazon@SydniDeverauxFollow

Yeah, I figure my bourbon into MyFitnessPal...you wanna say somethin about it? #bwahahaha

1:50 AM - 02 Feb 15ReplyRetweetFavorite

Advertisement

26. At times, it's borderline needy.

Honestly @MyFitnessPal you are *so* needy. I've not logged my lunch because I haven't had it yet. FML.

HodgePodgeDays Blog@HodgePodgeDaysFollow

Honestly @MyFitnessPal you are *so* needy. I've not logged my lunch because I haven't had it yet. FML.

1:57 PM - 04 Feb 15ReplyRetweetFavorite

27. And can really rain on your parade.

SO to my fitness pal app for telling me I'm using too much peanut butter. I don't need your negativity this morning 😤

April Reneé △⃘⃒⚯͛@HahahaohAprilFollow

SO to my fitness pal app for telling me I'm using too much peanut butter. I don't need your negativity this morning

4:42 PM - 03 Feb 15ReplyRetweetFavorite

28. It's always devastating with the numbers turn red.

instagram.com

29. Made even worse when it THREATENS YOU with how much you'll weigh if "every day were like today".

logged my calories/meals for yesterday, it was a cheat day. MyFitnessPal says "If everyday were like today, you'd weigh 232 pounds in 5 wks"

The Police@TheRealFive_OhFollow

logged my calories/meals for yesterday, it was a cheat day. MyFitnessPal says "If everyday were like today, you'd weigh 232 pounds in 5 wks"

2:26 PM - 31 Jan 15ReplyRetweetFavorite

Advertisement

30. Although, when the numbers say black, their weight projection could be quite satisfying.

instagram.com

You know it's just an app and just a projection, but it can still make you feel like you're making positive progress towards being healthy.

31. When you're trying to scan the barcode of what you're eating at work and the damn flash on your phone turns on, giving you away.

"Um...I was just taking a picture of this granola bar...for Instagram purposes."

32. If you do add any friends on MyFitnessPal, you learn other people's "cheat days" look very different to yours.

HOW ARE FLOURLESS PANCAKES CHEATING?!

33. When a fellow friend on MFP notices that your logged weight has actually gone up.

Pop Aesthete / Giphy / Via giphy.com

HI MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS THANKS SO MUCH.

Advertisement

34. But also when a friend "likes" any progress you make.

THANK YOU FOR NOTICING MY .03 kg WEIGHT LOSS IT REALLY MEANS A LOT.

35. Ultimately, though, you're so much happier when you're trying to be healthy, and the perks that come from working out.

36. Plus, it makes those cheat days all the more sweet.

MTV / Giphy

Because yes, you need cheat days. MyFitnessPal's threatening red numbers be damned.