33 Tips For Having The Best Sex Of Your Life

    None of which involve unrealistic flexibility, doughnuts, or twisting your hands in opposite directions.

    It's not always easy to find good sex advice.

    So we asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to tell us their best sex tips that are actually helpful. Here's what they came up with:

    1. First of all, know that sex can be whatever the hell you want it to be.

    2. Be really fucking enthusiastic.

    3. Don't think of sex as give-and-take.

    4. Sex doesn't have to involve penetration — no matter what your sexual orientation.

    5. Also, you're totally allowed to touch yourself — with your hand or a sex toy or whatever — during sex.

    6. Being super amped while going down on someone will make it so much better.

    7. Take the orgasm off the table. If it happens, it happens.

    8. Remember: You are actually the sexiest person alive.

    9. If your partner has a clitoris, find it and make sure it gets ample attention.

    10. If your partner has testicles, you probably want to pay some attention to those, too.

    11. Don't default to the same three moves. Just be present and tweak your technique accordingly.

    12. Actually ask what your partner likes and wants, then deliver (if you're cool with it).

    13. Awkward noises happen. Carry on.

    14. Don't put so much pressure on virginity, because what does that even mean anyway?

    15. Spend some time learning how to give yourself an orgasm before you get naked with someone else.

    16. Sloooww dooowwwn and spend a good amount of time on foreplay.

    17. Definitely don't forget foreplay (and lube) before anal sex.

    18. If anal sex isn't the only item on the agenda, clean up before the next act. Don't go from anal to vaginal or oral without washing up and changing condoms.

    19. If you have a vagina, pee shortly after sex.

    20. Buy some lube, and actually use it.

    21. When looking for anal sex toys, make sure it has a flared base.

    22. Write a sex to-do list. And a definitely-don't-do list and a maybe-possibly-try list.

    23. Make sure your privates are clean. Because, manners.

    24. And always wash your hands before touching your partner's naked body.

    25. Laugh, joke, and be your weird self.

    26. Make some noise when something feels good.

    "Be communicative. That way they feel more comfortable communicating and you both learn more quickly what the other person enjoys."

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    27. And seriously stop faking it.

    28. Actually talk about sex with the person you're having sex with.

    29. Just go ahead and ask about that random thing you really want to try. You never know — they might be into it, too.

    30. Flavored condoms can be cool — but only for oral sex.

    31. If you're in a position that's doing nothing for you, suggest switching things up.

    32. Don't ever forget that you and your body are worthy of respect and protection.

    33. Relax. Nobody really knows what they’re doing.

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    Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.