27 Things You Discover When You Get A Cat

So much shade in such a small body.

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1. First thing's first... you don't own the cat, the cat owns you.

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"I see I have a new jester to entertain me." —Your cat

2. Once you adopt your cat/kitten, you will never want to stop taking pictures.

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"OMG look! It's sitting!!!!!!!"

3. But just when your cat does look really cute, it turns into a demon once you try to take a picture.

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WHY JINXY WHY?!

4. Sometimes your cat will throw so much shade at you for no reason.

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NONE.

5. Cats on glass tables will never stop being amazingly cute.

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LOOK AT ITS SQUISHED PAWS.

6. In fact, odds are, capturing this rare occurrence on film will become the best part of your day.

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A once-in-a-lifetime moment in the household cat kingdom.

9. Taking your cat to the vet is much harder than it seems, because cats hate carriers.

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"Oh, Snowball refuses to get in its kennel? No big deal. It's not like he'll CLIMB EVERYWHERE IN THE CAR."

10. If you open a book, magazine, or laptop, your cat will come over. It will immediately lie on it.

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If you're not here to learn, get out.

11. Your cat may or may not jump on your face in the middle of the night thinking you're some kind of prey.

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... They already are hunting you and planning to overrun the house.

12. When your cat's pupils get big, it's not that they want to look cute, it's that they want TO KILL YOU.

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But really...

13. When you're packing for a trip, your cat will beg to go with you by getting in your suitcase.

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Er... at least you'll think it wants to go with you.

14. Cats love ruining rolls of toilet paper.

Or they're just really into mummies.

15. Your cat will watch you do chores, and will judge you the whole time.

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Your cat is just trying to supervise.

16. And laundry is its favorite chore to oversee.

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King of the warm clothes basket.

17. At times, you will panic because you can't find your cat and think it's dead, only for it to show up in the most random hiding spot.

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Welp, just wasted 20 minutes.

18. If their bowl is semi-empty, they will complain by meowing loudly and hating everything about you.

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"Why can't you understand anything?" —Your cat

19. This means they're content and stretching.

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WTF.

20. Cats get fat so incredibly easily.

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And will be resistant to working out.

21. One reason being they actually eat people food.

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I didn't adopt a dog. Thx.

22. And for some reason, they think they're much smaller than in reality.

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23. Your cat will knock over things and give ZERO shits.

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"Pick it up, peasant." —Your cat

24. And it will throw up just because, and just look at you, waiting for you to clean it.

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Rude.

25. But cats do know how to rock a Halloween costume and look amazingly cute in it.

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Catdog is so much cuter than a hotdog dog.

26. And they're the perfect snuggly accessory.

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It's like a stuffed animal in real life!

27. But really, you love their sass and shade because it prepares you for the real world.

“Why are you so emotionally strong?” your friends will ask.

“Oh, I have a cat,” you’ll then retort.

All hail cats, no matter how strange they may be!