1. A better smell than a brand-spankin'-new one of these:

Via recultured.com
2. A more exciting sight to see when you walk into a room:

Via thefind.com
3. A more accurate way to predict your future:

4. A better way to travel the world:

5. Anything as terrifying as this:

6. A way to have more fun with 25 cents:

Via amazon.com
7. A better way to consume your daily intake of fruits and vegetables:

Via i.imgur.com
8. A cooler way to wake up in the morning:

Via i.imgur.com
9. A better place to disappear in:

10. Something that will ruin your tongue as violently as these:

11. Anything more embarrassing than this:

Via quickmeme.com
12. Anything more rewarding than getting a gold star:

Via izismile.com
13. A better way to tell someone you love them:

14. A even better way someone could tell you that they loved you:

15. A more exciting reason to go get fast food:

Via etsy.com
16. A more HARDCORE toy:

17. A wiser man than Mr. Rogers:

Via reddit.com
18. A more exciting day at school:

19. A better place to conquer the world from:

20. A more soothing musical duo:

Via watchpbj.com
21. The original smartphone:

22. A snack that transcends our dimension:

23. A movie scene as PAINFUL as this one:

Via knowyourmeme.com
24. A better sign that it was time to go to sleep:

Via tumblr.com
25. A better pair of friends:

Via amazon.com
26. A more unpleasant sound than this blood-curdling racket:
View this video on YouTube
27. Cereal in ENJOYABLE, MOUTH-DESTROYING shapes:

Via picalishious.com
28. A more perfect first family:

29. A more delicious kind of dirt:

30. A more cutthroat game:

Via destructoid.com
31. A more satisfying way to learn math:

32. A more pleasing sound than the sound this thing made:

Via memecenter.com
33. A better way to organize your prized possessions:

Via etsy.com
34. A sweeter scent than scratch-and-sniff:

35. A more comforting sight than this at night:

Via amazon.com
36. A better way to dig for treasure:

Via hooniverse.com
37. A exciting way to learn about animals:

Via gawker.com
38. And a better feeling than waking up on a hot summer morning, knowing that the only responsibility you had was to be home in time for dinner:

Via kidsportsmagazine.com
It really never gets better than that.