People are swarming the 7 News Australia Facebook page, messaging the poor social media editors with apparent crime reports that turn out to be anything but.
Screenshots uploaded to Simpsons fan page Four Finger Discount show dozens of people have shared their own messages to the news channel's team.
And some of them are really, really good.
Even poor old Frank Grimes Sr. gets a mention.
Good work, people. Hopefully 7 News can solve this ancient mystery as well.