Bale (vs) Bale. Why Christian Bale Is Superior.

Ahead of Gareth Bale’s world-record $100 Million transfer to Real Madrid we compare the two biggest Bale’s in the world.

1. Before we begin -

They are NOT related

2. Now let us continue.

Christian certainly has the better stare.

3. Christian Bale is known for his dramatic body transformations. GARETH BALE IS NOT.

When Christian worked on “The Machinist” he ate only an apple and a can of tuna a day.

4. Christian Bale was (and will always be) Batman. GARETH BALE HAS NEVER BEEN A SUPERHERO.

Oh - and fuck you Ben Affleck.

5. Christian Bale has won an Oscar. GARETH BALE HAS NEVER EVEN BEEN NOMINATED.

It’s just sad, Gareth. Just sad.

6. Christian Bale was in his first film when he was 12. GARETH BALE WASN’T EVEN BORN YET.

Just look at him. He could have played his younger self in Batman Begins if he wanted. IF. HE. WANTED.

7. Christian has three sisters. GARETH ONLY HAS ONE.

Look at that swanky Welsh family. Kind of looks like the cast of “The Nanny.”

8. Christian is the king of accents. GARETH ONLY HAS HIS SHITTY WELSH ONE.

Christian is well known to keep his differing accents ‘on’ when he is being interviewed about the film. ‘Cause he’s a good guy. And Gareth is not.

9. And finally…

Christian Bale can do THIS.

Don’t fuck with Christian. DON’T. FUCK. WITH. HIM.

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