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31 Perfect Gifts For People Who Love Condiments

Fries are just edible ketchup spoons.

1. A subscription to Fuego Box, the mouth party that delivers monthly.

2. A t-shirt with very clear in-case-of-emergency instructions.

3. This all-occasion banner.

4. A keychain for people who know the truth, and the truth is that dry rub is bullshit.

5. This crew-neck sweatshirt for someone with priorities.

6. A mobile to end all mobiles.

7. Wall art for people who consider "spicy" a major food group.

8. A tank for you weirdos who would probably just drink ranch from the bottle if no one were watching.

9. These ceramic chalkboard condiment jars for the cookout hostess with the mostess.

10. This set of saucy onesies and matching caps.

11. Mike's Hot Honey for pizza, chicken, ribs, biscuits, salads, fruits, cheeses, ice cream, sensual fun, wounds, you name it.

12. A phone case for someone whose religious affiliation is guac.

13. An organic cotton hot sauce rattle for the future foodie.

14. *pew!* *pew!* *pew! pew!* MUSTARD GUN.

15. This PG-13 flatware.

16. A pack of pins for the condiment groupie.

17. The perfect gift set for anyone that's a slut for salted caramel.

18. A candle that smells like the only smell that matters.

19. These very content condiment and wiener link keychains.

20. A pair of friendship necklaces for the power duo.

21. Cufflinks for someone you wish would stop ordering ketchup at fancy restaurants.

22. A tote to carry what matters.

23. These PET CONDIMENTS, because I'd run away too after four years of dry-ass kibble.

24. An ornament that'll spice up someone's tree.

25. A gift box full of Harry & David's best-selling gourmet relishes.

26. A t-shirt for advocates who know that marinara's Schedule 1 classification is just a conspiracy that favors the monopoly on regulations by Big Parma.

27. Fridge magnets that remind you what to stock up on.

28. An adorable container of crocheted nuggets and sauces that we'll just get drunk and be mad at.

29. A ceramic gravy boat warmer that serves gravy, dressings, cheese sauces, melted butter, and ice cream toppings at the perfect temperature.

30. A miniature condiment picnic table for someone who likes funny tiny picnic tables.

31. Or a donation on a loved one's behalf to the National Mustard Museum in Middleton, Wisconsin.

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