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    Dec 22, 2017

    17 WTF Things Real-Life Parents Have Said To Their Kids

    "Don't put your binky in the dog's butt."

    We asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to tell us the weirdest thing they've said as a parent and the responses were hilarious, weird, and so, so real:

    1. "We don't use our penis to play with the iPad."

    E! Entertainment Television

    2. "Get that onion out of your pants!"

    3. "Poop goes in the toilet, not on windows!"

    TvLand

    ismunt

    4. "No twerking in the shower!"

    TvLand

    5. "Please use your indoor scream."

    Comedy Central

    6. "Get the lizard out of your mouth."

    7. "Don't put your binky in the dog's butt."

    ABC

    sac9488

    8. "Boogers aren't good presents."

    NBC

    –Sherri Milk Antal, Facebook

    9. "Stop rubbing mashed potatoes on your brother's nipples!"

    10. "Please get your feet out of the popcorn."

    11. "Don't drink your bath water!"

    ABC

    12. "Stop petting the dog with your quesadilla!"

    13. "Peeing on your brother in the tub is not helping him take a shower."

    SpikeTv

    14. "Cheese is not a bookmark."

    15. "We don't chase friends with our butts."

    Paramount Pictures

    16. "You aren't going anywhere until you figure out where that smell in your room is coming from."

    17. "Hooray, it's the weekend! Oh wait, I'm a mom."

    Bravo

    nsab120

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    Some responses have been edited for length and clarity.

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